Arc 5, Chapter 40 – “Corrosion of Wrath”

 

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All rights belong to Tappei Nagatsuki, the original author of the Re:Zero series. This is an English translation of the free web novel which is available at:

http://ncode.syosetu.com/N2267BE/

Translated by:

• Nanashi-tan
• Phantaminum

Proofread by:

• Phantaminum
• SSCaide

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Twenty-five shelters per district made a total of a hundred shelters in all of Pristella.

At Al’s suggestion, they started their search on First Street, where they were more likely to be able to find those needing help. They were required to travel prudently and move cautiously in order to avoid as much combat as possible.

Al: [Having said that, I feel like we’re overreacting. After all, we have that bro with us. You’d think we wouldn’t need to be so scared, bro.]

Subaru: [It’s best to be careful. Our own forces are limited, whereas the enemy’s barely been scratched. Even one second of negligence’d cost us. Not to mention, in addition to the enemy, we’re trying to avoid others causing a commotion.]

Anastasia’s opinion, back in the City Hall―― she had introduced the notion that the populace’s unrest could lead to riots. Although he wanted to believe it would not happen, he could not deny that possibility.

Visiting the various shelters and trying to assess the situation while recruiting combat power—― Subaru intended his mission to be an opportunity to fight the mounting sense of anxiety.

Al: [Yep, that also sounds about right… Well, you won’t hear me complain about going the safe route. After all, if it comes down to a fight, all I can do is rely on that bro.]

Subaru: [You… often say that, but are you really unable to fight? You did manage to reach the City Hall safely.]

Al: [If I had to choose between combatant and non-combatant, I’d have to go with the former. However, at best, my skill’s just that of a normal person. If I’m up against those who have gone beyond the limits of a normal human, I’d be a corpse at the edge of the screen[1] in about two seconds. Nope, no way, it’d be way too reckless to consider.]

Making a noise with the rim of his helmet and waving his right arm about in dismissal, Al declared his own powerlessness.

Although somewhat dissatisfied with his attitude, Subaru’s views on the matter matched Al’s. There was a certain level of skill that he would never be able to reach. Perhaps the difficulty of survival in this world meant that its inhabitants’ biological composition was fundamentally different. No matter how much Subaru trained, he would never be able to match the likes of Julius or Garfiel, let alone Reinhard―― no one could ever reach that level.

Subaru: [But, that shouldn’t be enough reason not to fight.]

Al: [Shouldn’t it? Personally, I think that having no chance of victory is more than enough to convince me not to even try. Ahhh, except leaving something like regrets behind. Well, I’m not that kinda person, anyway.]

Subaru: [————]

Al: [C’mon, don’t be mad, bro. I think your positive attitude is great. It’s just not one I can really adopt myself. That’s all.]

With the stance of each party already established, their dialogue could only run parallel. Subaru kept quiet, and Al apologized for putting him in a bad mood, before noticing something and raising his head. Following his land of sight was Garfiel, who had been quietly scouting the road that lay ahead.

Crouching on all fours, Garfiel turned back eerily silently, wrinkling his nose.

Garfiel: [Looks like the next three roads’re all clear. Or actually, more like lifeless ‘n barren ‘n empty. It’s technically safe, but really damn suspicious, yeah?]

Garfiel snorted, despite the positive impression.

Avoiding battles had been their goal, but not having encountered a single incident also fueled a sense of unease. A quite puzzling feeling, however time did not allow them to entertain such hesitation.

Subaru: [Pointlessly fretting won’t do us any good. The shelter we’re targeting’s just up ahead. Let’s get there as fast as we can. The roads are safe, yeah?]

Garfiel: [My amazin’ nose says so, at least. Damn, looks like we don’t have any other choice.]

Scratching his short blond hair, Garfiel stomped the ground in frustration. Subaru nodded, and Al’s silent shrug indicated that he had no objections.

Although their journey from the City Hall had already taken about fifteen minutes, thanks to their caution, it had been safe and sound thus far. After all, the worst case that they had considered would be that the Witch Cult had stationed troops all about the city.

Thinking that they would stumble upon road after road of that lot would be no exaggeration.

Al: [Doesn’t it seem like the Witch Cult’s unexpectedly neglected to set up sentries?]

As he ran, Al turned to comment. Glancing at him, Subaru questioned him with a “Why would you think that?”

Al: [The reason’s very simple, they don’t have the manpower to monitor the streets. Haven’t you noticed, bro? Compared to the city’s vital points, the Witch Cult was lax in securing the city. And it’s the same with allowing the opposing force to move so freely. If they seriously wanted their demands fulfilled, they wouldn’t be acting like this.]

Subaru: [Blocking everything off and giving exact demands would be the common thing to do in that case, wouldn’t it? Then why do you think they didn’t? Is there any other goal?]

Al: [Hah, I wouldn’t claim to know. But, I’d imagine it’s something like――]

Although Al had probably wanted to respond casually, at Subaru’s stern glare, he fell silent for a moment, probably with a wry smile under his helmet.

Al: [—―Whether we comply with their demands or not doesn’t really matter.]

Subaru: [Huh?]

Al: [If they were serious about their demands, you’d think they’d have been more precise and detailed. However, I’m sure you’d agree there are ways of twisting their wording, bro… So they aren’t taking their demands seriously. If we follow through, great. If we don’t, whatever. It’s that kind of feeling.]

Subaru: [Why… then it’s like they’re just toying with us…!]

Al: [Aren’t they just toying with us? Is that really so unlikely?]

In contrast to Subaru’s speechlessness, Al spoke with a blank, listless voice. And to his final question, Subaru found himself unable to even deny it.

―—They were simply being toyed with. That was all.

Considering the vicious imagination of the Witch Cult, such a possibility was no joke. During their attack, although they had acted with the advantage and made tactically sound decisions, there were many places where their movements were incomprehensible.

During the battle in the City Hall, Capella and Alphard had been lying in ambush, but Sirius and Regulus were absent, indicating that they were not using their entire strength. In addition, Subaru’s party had suffered no casualties.

Now, the disparity between the city’s occupation and the Witch Cult’s lax attitude also served as evidence that the Cult were not doing their utmost to have their demands be met.

Garfiel: [Captain! No need to listen that bastard’s words. You, if ya keep casually plantin’ funny thoughts like that in the captain’s head, my amazin’ self’ll grind ya to dust, yeah?]

As Subaru fell into a sea of contemplativeness, Garfiel turned to glare at Al, who was running alongside Subaru, with a ferocious gaze as he snapped at him.

Garfiel: [Endlessly chatterin’ on ‘bout stuff that doesn’t even matter, a bastard like ya, without even the balls to fight, should just shut the fuck up! No matter what those fuckers’re plottin’, my amazin’ self’ll just keep hittin’ and beatin’ and crushin’em! That’s all ya need to know!]

Al: [Aren’t you suggesting extreme measures again, huh? Although it is true that I’m no match in a real confrontation against them, that doesn’t mean my thoughts don’t matter. Speaking of which, what harm does guessing their intentions bring us, huh?]

Garfiel: [You bastard——]

As his teeth made a sharp ringing sound, Garfiel’s feet grinded to a halt. At the same time, Al also stopped moving, filling the atmosphere with tension.

Subaru cut between them at once, holding a hand against each of their chests.

Subaru: [Hold up! The hell’s wrong with the two of you? Is this really time to be turning your weapons on allies?]

Garfiel: [This bastard’s not an ally, captain. It’s clear he’s up to no good. It’s definitely best if we just did away with him here ‘n now.]

Al: [Actively looking for a fight’s a no thank you, but I’m not one to stick to non-resistance when someone’s motivated to fight.]

Garfiel cracked his wrists, and Al turned around. Subaru, frustrated at their attitude, felt rage begin to boil within him as well. The pricking of a thousand thorns emanated from the core of his body, bidding him to beat and punch and kick the two uncooperative men——

Subaru: […Something’s wrong.]

He was worried about the possibility of his head overheating and immediately jumping to murder as a response. No matter what, his own anger had escalated too quickly. And why were all of them so hostile and frustrated to the point of turning on each other?

And the conflict between the two seemed to be agitating Subaru as well——

Subaru: [No… way…]

An inability to direct the flow of his thoughts and feelings—— with that realization, Subaru felt a chill. After all, he had felt this exact sense of discomfort many times before.

Subaru: [Is Sirius’s influence approaching…!?]

Fanning his face with slaps, Subaru tried to reawaken his own consciousness as he glanced around.

His inspection yielded no sightings of that bizarre monster, nor did he hear her jarring voice. However, the dim feeling of gloom and disgust pressed heavily into his very being.

Subaru: [Hey, Garfiel, Al, stop! Take a deep breath and calm down. Isn’t it strange that your argument’s escalating so quickly? That’s probably due to Wrath’s influence. Your emotions are becoming uncontrollable.]

Garfiel: [Hah? Whaddya mean, captain, this guy’s stupidity’s what’s pissin’… wait.]

Subaru: [————]

Hearing Subaru’s claim, Garfiel gritted his teeth, pressing a palm onto his head. Slowly, he shook his head and blinked many times in quick succession.

Garfiel: […It’s not really worth fightin’ over. That kinda thing’s usually only just an annoyance.]

Subaru: [That’s Wrath’s ability. Just to confirm, but you are sure there are no enemies around us, right?]

Garfiel: [Not a whiff, nor a sign… that’s for sure. But…]

Precisely because his senses were so trustworthy, Garfiel began to shudder.

In other words, the scope of the Sirius’s power was far beyond their imagination. If the theory that she was currently occupying a control tower was correct, then her Authority’s influence encompassed almost the entire city. Of course, there was quite the difference compared to its intensity in the square.

Al: [Well now. This is what it feels like to be tampered with by others. Not something I’d want to experience more than once, for damn sure. Now I’ve tasted the worst feeling.]

Al murmured, the torrent of anger engulfing him cleared, much like Garfiel’s. He glanced over at Subaru, lifting his chin.

Al: [But, bro. If we don’t get a move on, it’s dangerous, no?]

Subaru: [What? What are you talking about?]

Al: [You noticed something was strange, bro, and after listening to what you said, we also realized something was wrong. However, that’s not the case for other people, yeah? If this feeling is spreading through the entire city… then, for the average person, unaware of the situation, it’d be impossible to stay rational, yeah?]

Subaru: [——Hk!]

As he considered what Al had pointed out, the worst-case scenario flashed through Subaru’s mind. He exchanged a glance with Garfiel, who had imagined the same scenario and flinched sharply. Instantly, they sprang into action, beginning a reckless sprint. Their destination was the nearest shelter.

Al: [Ah, wait!]

Watching the two of them shoot off, Al hurriedly turned to chase them from behind.

In his anxiety, Subaru completely disregarded stealth as he raced forward with irresponsible abandon. Garfiel’s steps, however, were sharper and travelled farther than Subaru’s, and in the blink of an eye, he had left Subaru in the dust. His shadow vanished at the T junction of the next street.

According to the map, there should be a shelter at the corner into which Garfiel had disappeared.

Al: [Is the road safe!?]

Subaru: [Garfiel rushed in without any hesitation. So no one’s there!]

Answering the shouts coming from behind, Subaru arrived at the corner, lagging far behind Garfiel. Without losing so much as a single drop of momentum, he turned the corner and saw the stone cottage. Rushing towards the hastily opened door, he confirmed that there was indeed a ladder connecting to the ground and frantically sprinted down the stairs, his dim field of vision finally opening up——

Subaru: [You’re… kidding me…]

——Splattered with blood and screams of sorrow, a landscape of hell spread before him.

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Al: [They killed and killed each other… Only a fifth of them are still breathing, and those guys are going to have to completely recover. This is really the worst of situations.]

Gazing upon that horrific scene, Al bit back his feelings and whispered with a strangled voice. Subaru, sitting beside him, had no energy to respond.

In the shelter that they had rushed into, the people gathered in the refuge had turned on each other, causing a fratricidal catastrophe.

The initial argument had most likely been a trivial matter.

Forced to squeeze into a cramped, claustrophobic space, fearing the demands that the Witch Cult had broadcasted. During that time, dark thoughts had snuck their way into their hearts. The situation would not improve even if it stayed as is, so it would be okay for them to take action, right? Those emerging ideas roused action, and action required contact with others. However, the consequences of such contact were not necessarily anything good.

The explosive conflict between Garfiel and Al, on the road, had been the product of such a thing as well.

However, there had been no Subaru in the shelter to calm everyone down. The quarrels had intensified as everyone’s feelings collided and spread, infecting the surrounding area, doubling the effect. As emotions had risen back and forth, their unbearable anxieties grew into abominations. That had ultimately resulted in tragedy.

Garfiel: [The survivors have fainted, and their wounds have been treated. But the burial of the dead… that‘ll have to wait. Captain, have ya contacted ‘em yet?]

Subaru: [I have. The Iron Fang should be on their way here. I think entrusting the survivors to them will be fine. The problem is, after that…]

Subaru had underestimated the degree of the disaster caused by the amplification and propagation of the emotions.

In the closed space dubbed a shelter, the intensity of the waves of emotion inside the hearts of people was unpredictable. Of course, no one would be able to maintain a positive and optimistic attitude, and even if those emotions were negative, nuances could still usher in tremendous differences.

If the initial feelings were only sorrow, lament, or despondency, without any initiative to take action, the people would be relatively fine. However, if the initial emotion had been rage, or anything similar, the result would the same they were witnessing inside this shelter.

Subaru: [I’ve heard that people were urged to flee to these shelters, but… that may have been a bad idea in hindsight.]

Assuming that the Authority of Wrath worked on the basis of sharing and intensifying emotions, then the greater number of people residing in her sphere of influence, the more effective her power would become.

In short, if people were mirrors, any beams of light originating from them would be reflected back infinitely due to the sheer number of reflections. Replace light with emotions, and it goes without saying that said emotions would be greatly amplified.

Even the most minimal contact with others would have terrifying consequences.

In this situation of unease and fear, this Authority forced each person to be alone.

Subaru: [How disgusting…]

Garfiel: [Captain, what are we gonna do? I agree wit’cha on visiting these shelters, but if things go on like this…]

Having finished with healing, Garfiel, his forehead drenched in sweat, wore an anxious expression. Understanding the reason for his unease, Subaru fretted over the wording of his response.

No matter what, Subaru could not organize his thoughts. To visit the various shelters, to assemble forces, to call on everyone to not abandon hope―― none of those courses of action were wrong.

However, the pressing situation did not leave Subaru with the time to comb the city.

The handful of people who were willing to fight on had likely been the source of the tragedy. Their hearts had brought about strife. With the shelters functioning as isolated test tubes of emotions, persuading the remaining people to leave the shelters might even improve their chances of survival.

Subaru: [But if we do that and fail to retake the control towers, everyone will die.]

After all, these were shelters set up in the city of Pristella.

Perhaps they had been designed to protect its citizens against any potential floods causing by the opening of the floodgates. In the unlikely event that Subaru and the others were overwhelmed and the watergates were released, those who would have left the shelters for fear of their companions would suffer certain deaths.

Whether staying inside or going outside, a foolproof measure did not exist.

Garfiel: [Captain…]

Subaru: [————]

As Subaru wallowed in indecision, Garfiel’s gaze pierced his profile.

That was an expression and voice which sought answers and salvation from Subaru. That was the figure of someone seeking the only light they could depend on in a world of darkness, looking for guidance and reassurance.

How could Subaru respond to that expression?

Just like him, Subaru was also grasping at straws for a solution. Just like him, Subaru too could not find an answer amidst the darkness.

However, there was no point in complaining about his weakness. Throwing a tantrum, raging to the heavens, taking it out on someone, would save no one. If he had the leisure to complain about his weaknesses, it would be far better for him to say something meaningful.

Anything meaningful at all would be fine, as long as it benefited someone else.

Al: [Captain this, captain that… Really, it’s like you’re casting a reliable, convenient charm, bro. What an outstanding attitude, it’s making me tear up, really.]

However, the one who suddenly broke Subaru’s silence was instead the man with a sword. Leaning his back against the wall, Al’s gaze moved from the scene of horror to Garfiel.

His cold indifference took Garfiel aback for a spell.

Garfiel: [Hah? The hell’s that mean, ya bastard…]

Al: [Do you not understand without having me explain it? It’s exactly as I said. Refusing to think and delegating your judgement to others is easy. Is “captain” some kind of magic spell to you? Is it the name of a superman who can get you out of any tough situation?]

Interrupting Garfiel was Al’s mocking attitude.

Al: [From just those moments I can tell how much you depend on him, but does this guy here look like such a big shot? In terms of strength, you have him beat, no question. In terms of intelligence, there’ll always be someone out there better than him. And luck? Even if you said he’s got good luck when he’s stuck in a situation like this, no one’d believe you, yeah?]

Garfiel: [Shut the fuck up! Ya fuckin’ bastard, quit talkin’ shit ‘bout the Captain like that! The hell do ya even know ‘bout him? This person here’s damn amazin’!]

Al: [Wow, wow, are you just a kid? Where’s that strength, then? If he really were as amazing as you say, he’d have taken care of this whole deal by now. Or are you saying that he’s already thought up a solution, and he’s just pretending to fumble along?]

Even as Garfiel began shouting, Al’s ironic tone did not falter. And as he learned over to peer into Subaru’s face, Subaru found that he could not retort to any of his words.

At that reaction, Al straightened up, continuing with a “You see?”

Al: [Being responsible for everything, carrying everyone on your back, is remarkable, isn’t it. It’s a protagonist’s privilege. However, most average people cannot take on such a role. They’re not strong enough. Of course, that goes without saying for me, and even you, bro. You’re the same. So why do you have to carry such a burden? Don’t get your hopes up. It’s pitiful, isn’t it?]

Subaru: [————]

Subaru did not quite understand what Al was trying to say. Could he be under the sway of the Authority of Wrath once again? If so, what kind of feeling was now dominating Al’s heart?

Anger? Sadness? Something else entirely?

He seemed furious, but also mournful, and also mocking. Even figuring out what he felt in that moment was of extreme difficulty.

Al: [Hey, bro. What’s been troubling you all this time?]

Subaru: […What’s been troubling me?]

How to save this city. How to keep the people who had fled to the shelters safe from harm. How to rescue Emilia. How to cure Crusch. How to restore Rem’s memories. How to drive away the Witch Cult. How to find the optimal path, where everyone would be saved.

Al: [How to best serve your venerated princess—— are you unable to even answer that immediately?]

Subaru: [————]

Hearing the disappointment in Al’s voice, Subaru slowly raised his head.

Motionlessly, Al was looking down at Subaru. As his face was covered with a helmet, his expression was indiscernible. However, somehow, Subaru found his own chest being saddled with anxiety.

Al: [I only care about the Princess… about Priscilla. So everyone else, frankly speaking, is completely irrelevant to me. For example, acting together with you, bro, is only so I can improve my odds of surviving and finding the Princess.]

Subaru: [Al…]

Al: [So, that’s why I don’t understand your feelings at all, bro. That’s important, this is a priority… In that case, it’ll be impossible for you to see what’s most important. Wanting to take care of everything, doesn’t that just make you a cliché of a guy who doesn’t know how to fight for what you find most important?]

Clicking his tongue, Al strangled some kind of emotion.

Even Garfiel could not find a retort to that devilish demeanor. And even Subaru, who bore the brunt of it, could not find the correct words to return.

Al: [The silver-haired miss is the most important thing for you, isn’t she, bro? If you’re just saving her, do away with the fretting and hesitating and act. It’ll be easy.]

Subaru: […Don’t bullshit me. I’ll definitely kill the bastard who kidnapped Emilia. And in any case, it’s not like I even have any idea how to. It isn’t as easy as you say.]

Al: [But you’d have much less to burden you compared to saving everything. If you reduce your load, your body becomes lighter, and the scope of your reach will increase. Isn’t that the case?]

Subaru’s weak words of resistance were smoothly deflected by Al’s snappy comment.

Al: [Are you trying be a saint? Or a hero? If so, it doesn’t suit you whatsoever.]

Shrugging his shoulders, Al discarded Subaru’s confusion as something ridiculous. Subaru found that very attitude incomprehensible.

Back when he had quarreled with Anastasia in the City Hall, the one who could even described as stubbornly assertive, and who regarded him as an ally, had been none other than Al.

It had been Al who had agreed to his approach on evil, laced with self-satisfaction. However, after arriving here, why he had changed his opinion?

Subaru: [What you’re saying now is totally different from before. Are you or are you not on my side, which is it?]

Al: [No, no, no, you’re completely off. I’m not saying that indulging in self-satisfaction’s wrong. But the limit of that self-satisfaction’s another topic entirely. Your idea of wanting to rescue everyone, bro, was denied upon seeing the horror in this shelter, right? In that case, it’s enough, isn’t it? If that’s the case, why not just leave this place? You can be honest now, and protect only that which is most important to you.]

Subaru: [Leave this place… You mean running away? In this situation?]

Al: [What’s so wrong about it? What’s wrong with choosing to flee in the face of something you can’t handle? After recovering the Princess, I intend to flee from the city. I don’t have any obligation to the people here, or to morals about humanity, or anything that justifies putting my life at risk.]

Sticking his fingers into the neck of the helmet and scratching lightly, Al glared at Subaru.

Al: [You could do that too, bro. Save just the miss… just Emilia, and run away, and you’ll be just fine. Anyway, the Witch Cult are pests that’ll just come back even if defeated here. Just like bandits on the side of the road, yeah? There’s no reason to get involved.]

There was only one answer to Al’s suggestion.

Subaru agreed that the Witch Cultists were pests. And it was undeniable that there was no benefit to being involved. However, they had been the ones instigating such a catastrophe. Subaru had to take action to dispel the sparks they had created.

From Al’s perspective, he probably had no idea why Subaru felt he had to act.

Of course, except for the situation of imminent peril Emilia was in, having been kidnapped. Even assuming Emilia’s situation was irrelevant, Subaru could never choose the option of escape.

And the question was why. Well, that was because——

Al: [And even if it needs to be done, it doesn’t have to be you, bro. So why are you so insistent?]

Subaru: [If a kid jumped into the road at a busy intersection with the light still red, before even thinking about a reason, I’d immediately pull him back onto the sidewalk… It’s probably something like that.]

Al: [————]

Al’s sigh in response to Subaru’s answer was obvious.

Subaru himself was wondering if his answer was truly the correct answer. But upon taking a moment to think about it, the words just rolled off his tongue, and the tightness in his chest vanished slightly.

Subaru: [I don’t find it a hassle to put everyone into consideration. Because I’m here, I’ll try to do those things, one by one. Because I’m here, I will be able to do things. There are a lot of places I won’t be able to reach, as the people here can prove.]

He thought it cowardly to pretend to be completely unrelated to the whole thing. It was something Subaru should not have even considered to do.

Garfiel: [Cap…]

As he began to call upon Subaru, who had responded so calmly, Garfiel seemed to cut himself off. Just now, Garfiel had hesitated to say the word “captain”. Al had just pointed out Garfiel’s reliance, so he was probably trying to resist the urge.

Subaru found himself pleased by Garfiel’s concerned hesitation.

At the same time, he realized something. A sudden idea. A miraculous coup that could be used to take advantage of the Authority of Wrath.

Subaru: [Garfiel, don’t hesitate, okay? Just call me the usual.]

Garfiel: [————]

Subaru: [Although, initially, you embarrassed me a little, but that shyness is long gone. Although there’s no guarantee that I can live up to your expectations, but I’ll try to do it as long as I can.]

He had no way of knowing what he looked like under the expectant gaze of Garfiel.

However, it was due to the result of Subaru’s actions that Garfiel was sometimes able to see him as a beacon of hope just when he thought he had reached a dead-end. And a once-lonely young girl, who had once denied everything, felt the same way.

Therefore, Subaru had no choice but to take responsibility for his actions.

Garfiel: […Yeah. Yeah, that’s right, Captain. Got it. My amazin’s self’s also going to be helpin’, no matter how much strength’s needed. So, as long as ya don’t say anythin’ feeble, it’ll turn out just fine.]

Subaru: [Alright. Then, I’ll be relying on you. After entrusting the wounded here to the Iron Fang, we’ll have to return to the City Hall immediately. After all, Anastasia will probably oppose it.]

Standing up and patting himself down, Subaru went over to Garfiel, his head still lowered, and struck his shoulder.

Garfiel snorted, clasping his fists together as he gazed him. Then, Subaru turned and tilted his head at a silent Al.

Subaru: [My mind’s been made. Although in a different direction than you were hoping for.]

Al: […As you prefer, bro. At least, I’ll follow you until we find the Princess, or until it becomes meaningless for me to stick with you.]

Although his proposal had been entirely rejected, Al responded without any disappointment.

Even if uncomfortable with his attitude, Subaru shifted his footsteps towards the outside of the shelter, prepared to act immediately after reinforcements arrived.

Behind him, along with Garfiel, Al followed suit, slightly distanced from them. As he regarded the backs of the two striding forward, Al reached for the back of his neck with his one arm, supporting it with a hand, and exhaled a long, long sigh.

Al: [I’m sure… you don’t know what will happen if you don’t meet the expectations of that many people. After all, without suffering in such a way, you probably would never understand.]

Translation Notes:

[1] – Expression used is literally “edge of a screen”, like a television’s, or a computer’s (画面端).