Arc 6 – Chapter 76, “The Hell Bearing the Name of Oneself”

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Translated By :

  • Ringo17

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ALL RIGHTS BELONG TO TAPPEI NAGATSUKI, THE ORIGINAL AUTHOR OF RE:ZERO STARTING A LIFE IN A DIFFERENT WORLD FROM ZERO, THIS IS A TRANSLATION OF THE FREE JAPANESE WEB NOVEL INTO ENGLISH

JAPANESE WEB NOVEL SOURCE

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“ーーーー”

ーーWith the young girl who had experienced『Return by Death』and was sobbing with her hands on her head before his eyes, Natsuki Subaru intently stared at his own palm.

It was not as if he was feeling hurt after having been called a monster, after having been spoken ill of.
That he was crazy. That it was impossible to withstand, he agreed with those notions as well.

Subaru himself, had died countless times until now.
He was aware of something as basic as those experiences being unordinary. But he had simply gritted his teeth, and endured it.
Believing with all his heart that it would be better for him to suffer than the death of someone aside from himself, a friend or an acquaintance, people whose names and faces he did not know, his precious comrades or the people he loved.
That wasーー,

Subaru: “ーーYeah, I sure am amazing, right, Natsuki Subaru.”

Tightly clenching the fist he had been gazing, Subaru『Sang His Own Praises』from the bottom of his heart.
He had been commended, through loose-lipped logic impossible to be held true. Such words had been used as if to console oneself, or for encouraging oneself.
However, the『Singing His Own Praises』just now had been different.

The『Memories』and『Real Experience』which had observed the existence named Natsuki Subaru terribly objectively, were commending the path oneself had walked until now.

Subaru: “Dang. I’m unexpectedly a pretty big deal, huh.”

And that was something which『Natsuki Subaru』, who had lost his『Memories』and had returned to the starting point of being summoned into the different world, and ultimately reached this point after taking a deep read of the『Books of the Dead』, could also be told.
Starting from being ignorant with regards to the different world, accumulating personal experiences of『Death』sufficient to equal the single year Subaru had lived through, and had returned without letting his heart shatter into pieces, impressively.
Thanks to that, the lost『Memories』and the『Memories』thereafter had been unified.

Subaru: “Meili, Shaula, entrusted to me, and I will take responsibility for them.”

Meili, for whom murder had become a habit, and had locked herself into a dark future.
Shaula, who had been liberated from a vain wait which lasted for four hundred years, and wished to continue the blessed present.

Subaru: “Ram and Julius, both of them sure act unreasonably. For those two to be doing that, that’s quite a feat.”

Ram, who already knew the best possible option, and displayed prudence more reliable than anyone.
Julius, who had lost his own resort, yet embraced faith and still resumed holding the sword.

Subaru: “Beatrice and Echidna, I’ve really been a bother to them as well. Geez, I’m such a……”

Beatrice, who dedicatedly supported Subaru, and noticed the limits of his heart before anyone else.
Echidna, who was utmost suspicious regarding Subaru’s amnesia, and had granted him forgiveness at its extremity.

“ーーーー”

And, no matter if he lost his『Memories』, no matter how many times he redid, he ultimately returned to the path of being drawn towards you.
He wanted to do that. He must do that. He could not think of any other path.
That is how much, you areーー,

Subaru: “ーーEMT.”

With love and certain tranquility on his lips, Subaru raised his face.
And looked at Louis, who still had her face covered and was shivering.

Subaru: “Hey.”

Louis: “Eek ~hk!”

Subaru: “……You’re too scared.”

Subaru scratched his cheek with a single finger upon her being excessively frightened by a single call.
She was a young girl with an outward appearance which could unobjectionably be called young. The form of that young girl shivering in fear, desperately rejecting the world was a sight heavy to the chest. It seemed she had been endowed with something akin to fleeting fragility which would make one thoughtlessly extend a hand to her, by birth.
Surely, an attainment of the nature to undo the opponent’s vigilance and crawling into their interior. ーーThat could perhaps be, a crystal pure like a child that had been coercively refined.
That Louis Arneb, who did not know of the world, was like an innocent, pure child.
Howeverーー,

Subaru: “ーーLouis Arneb, you lose.”

ーーNatsuki Subaru shall not forgive Louis Arneb, who was sobbing like a child.

“ーーーー”

Louis widened her eyes, frozen, upon the verification of defeat that had been slammed right before her.
Whilst witnessing fear fill her eyes like ink spilled on a white sheet, Subaru’s heart yet remained peaceful like the calm at sea.

The world was not filled with problems that could be ignored simply because of not knowing. And the deeds Louis or her siblings had committed were countless inhuman and demonic atrocities.
It was not as if she did not get a chance to know. Through the『Memories』of others, she must have also had a chance to come in contact with human emotions, likes and dislikes and learn from them.

However, what she absorbed from there was not something akin to affection for others, but a further dusky, grisly desire, and the conduct of trampling upon and spitting on the effortful lives of others.
Perhaps the fault was that of her teachers. Her elder brothers, had been bad role models of her life.
However, it was her decision to never use any chance to return back from the mistaken path.

Subaru: “You may know as well if you were a part of me. But the ranks which you all…… Sin Archbishops name yourself as is common with the seven deadly sins. “Seven deadly sins” is a pretty english term for chuunibyou purveyors, but there also exist the “Seven heavenly virtues” which are something close it.”

The seven deadly sins,『Pride』『Envy』『Wrath』『Gluttony』『Sloth』『Lust』『Greed』.
And the seven heavenly virtues,『Chastity』『Humility』『Temperance』『Patience』『Diligence』『Charity』『Kindness』.

If the seven deadly sins were karma impossible to be sundered from humans as long as they live, then these were seven conventions which mustn’t be forgotten in order for humans carrying the burden of those sins to live with others.
Because they respect that, humans can live with other humans.

Subaru: “But, you all…… you, violated that.”

That is why, the Sin Archbishops, Louis Arneb had become an unforgivable great evil.

Louis: “Eek, eek, eek……”

The frightened, curled up Louis was struck with Subaru’s words and was shivering as if she had experienced agony.
The slightest effort of others, of the world connected to fear. Subaru was also aware of that sensation.
Having tasted the other-worldly sensation called『Return by Death』, in a situation of not knowing how to surmount the obstacle however much one may『Die』, even the sound of dry leaves swaying in the breeze seemed fatal to life.
Because he remembered that feeling akin to the soul being frozen, Subaru closed his eyes.
And,

Subaru: “Louis Arneb, you lose.”

“ーーーー”

Subaru: “So, recognise that and release anything and everything.”

Once again, Subaru repeated her defeat such that she could hear it herself. On top of that, he pushed a firm demand toward the young girl, who remained silent upon hearing that.
The return of Subaru’s own『Memories』was due to the chance meeting between Natsuki Subaru, who lost his memories, and Natsuki Subaru of the moment immediately previous to his memories being robbedーー since his advance through the different world was replayed in the『Books of the Dead』, he was able to restore his own memories in the from of tracing them back.
In the form of re-experiencing the stolen『Memories』by utilising the『Books of the Dead』.
And fulfilling the unification of Subaru before and after losing『Memories』, the result was the successful second advent of Natsuki Subaru.

As it’s byproduct, Louis, who had gotten into Subaru in the form of a Witch Factor, had been forced out as a foreign substance. However Subaru had witnessed with his own eyes, her self-indulgent treatment of the stolen『Memories』of freely bringing them out and peeling them off.

If that was possible then a method to save the people who had their『Memories』, their『Names』robbed would beーー,

Subaru: “If we think of doing it, then we can do anything is what you said, right. Then……”

From being conceited and bragging about her own abilities, she had even succeeded in a stunt like splitting the Witch Factor into two.
Since she had achieved that, then surely it wasn’t impossible for her to cancel out the effects of her own Authority. If that, that alone, could come true, then perhapsーー,

ーーIt would be possible to recover the people who got their『Memories』and『Name』stolen, to recover Rem.

Subaru: “Then, release all of the people you’ve eaten up until now. If you do that……”

Louis: “……Do that, then what?”

“ーーーー”

Subaru articulated powerfully, but Louis shortly intercepted that voice.
Louis remained on white floor in the posture of pulling her knees towards herself, making her long, long golden hair spreading out on the floor blanket herself, she was glaring at Subaru through the gaps of her hair.
What dwelled in her eyes, was the sole unquestionable hue of fear.

Louis: “Do that, then what?”

Repeating, Louis piled up the same question yet again.
Subaru had been caught off guard by her retort for a moment, but got a hold of himself immediately after she displayed her stance of conversation. Far better than her not talking due to fear.
He must accept the words head-on and fumble around for a compromise plan that could change the situation.

Subaru: “Release the great number of people, you have eaten. If the『Names』return, then even the honour of the people who’ve already died can be restored. The people who are alive, can even reunite with their families. If you would do that, then I will let you……”

Louis: “ーーOff the hook, you say? If we do that, then onii-san will let us off the hook? Off the hook, you say?”

His words intercepted yet again, Subaru felt daunted.
Viewing that reaction of Subaru’s, Louis said “Hah” and opened her mouth bearing sharp fangs,

Louis: “That can’t be, isn’t it! That isn’t possible!”

Energetically lifting her face, Louis shouted with a blazing glint in her eyes.
Her two eyes glaring at Subaru, they immutably remained soaked in fear, twinkling darkly.
With those dark twinkles in her eyes, Louis forcefully rocked her body back and forth,

Louis: “It isn’t! It really isn’t, it isn’t after all, it indeed isn’t, we’re telling you it isn’t, as it isn’t, as we know it isn’t, that’s why! Onii-san will not let us off the hook! Absolutely certainly! After all”

“ーーーー”

Louis: “Onii-san, destroys his enemies! Absolutely crushes them until the very end of the end! Without any exception! Completely thoroughly! Closes it with a perfect game! He can do that! Then there’s no way he wouldn’t do that! There’s no point in him not doing that!”

As if having heard a first-class joke, Louis ended her silence and let her emotions explode.
And to Subaru, Louis’ outbursting form was visible as terribly distant, minute.
Louis’ facial expression was disordered, trying to laugh, trying to be angered, trying to be doleful, and baffled by the notation of fear not present in any of those, she was perplexed and was imploring.

“ーーーー”

The gateways of all of Louis’ surging emotions, all directly connected to『Fear』.
Regardless of whether they began with delight, rage or sadness. Knowing that all would ultimately lead to『Fear』, for what should she be delighted, be enraged, be saddened.

Even if she were to believe, that conclusion led to『Fear』as well.
Subaru was more than sufficiently aware of the ingrained nature of Louis’ rejection. Cursing the entirety of the world, being flung into a storm of suspicion and distrust, becoming trapped in a sensation of being forbid into the slightest movement.
That was, the hell named oneself which Natsuki Subaru had also experienced.

What pulled Subaru out of that hopeless hell, was surely because there had been someone who held his hand, and that warmth never let go of Subaru.

That was, the silver-haired young girl who had saved Subaru’s life, his heart when he had first arrived in the different world.
That was, the dressed young girl who strived to protect Subaru when he had been betrayed by anything and everything.
That was, the blue-haired young girl who gently made Subaru realise when he sought to abandon everything.

ーーThat was, the reason why Natsuki Subaru had remained without being prisoned in hell.

“ーーーー”

That foundation of heart was not possessed by Louis Arneb, who was drowned in fear before his eyes.

That is why, she did not possess the ability to conquer『Fear』. ーーShe could never think of『Return by Death』other than being a nightmarish curse of being dragged into an inescapable hell.
Though quite a clichéd expression, humans cannot live by themselves. That is why, for her to be saved, she, who was caged in『Fear』, it was necessary for someone to extend their hand to her.
Someone offering their hand, just as Subaru had been offered once.
Howeverーー,

Subaru: “ーーI will, not save you.”

ーーSubaru shall not extend his hand, to Louis Arneb.

Louis: “ーーAh.”

Subaru: “I will, not save you. Neither will I pity you.”

Louis Arneb, the Sin Archbishop of『Gluttony』, the blasphemer of『Souls』standing in the white world.
Not matter how sweet an appearance, no matter how miserable and transient an ambience, no matter how luring an attitude of craving being sheltered by adults were she to possess, Subaru shall not forgive her.
The Sin Archbishops had committed sins difficult to forgive. ーーThat was the conclusion, Natsuki Subaru had derived.

Subaru: “I’m sure no matter what I say, it’ll never prove to be salvation for you in the first place.”

Louis: “Eek.”

Louis’ distended eyes were filled with naught but terror toward Subaru.
In this place though only Subaru could understand the fear she bore, the very reason for her fear was Subaru himself. In other words, her labyrinth couldn’t possibly be opened up.
And upon Subaru’s head-on declaration that we won’t save her, that he detested her, Louis stabbed her claws into the shapeless white world and whilst desperately distancing herself away from Subaruーー,

Louis: “We know…… we know onii-san’s ploy! We had been onii-san after all! That’s why, we know what onii-san is going to do…… however, we won’t let you ~tsu!”

Subaru: “You……”

Louis: “Return what was eaten! Absolutely never! After all, this is our lifeline! If we lose this, then onii-san will be able to kill us! As long as this isn’t returned, onii-san won’t kill us! Its the other way around, the other way around, completely the other way around! In order to not be killed by onii-san, we, cannot return this! That’s why you kno~w!!”

Howling with a loud voice, Louis turned her palm towards Subaru. Its not as if something was being fired from the fair palm held out. However, Louis’ aim materialised in a different form.
Subaru’s field of vision steadily distorted into white, a change was yielded in the『Hall of Memories』. It commenced constricting the world, having detected the presence of a foreign substance and seeking to eliminate it.
As a result, Subaru’s existence was extracted outーー,

Louis: “Enough, we don’t want to be in the same place as onii-san for even a second! Impossible in terms of physiology! Impossible in terms of life! Impossible in terms of destiny you see! That’s why, disappear! The ones who will eat onii-san, will be onii-chan and nii-sama! Either of them can do however they please! No thanks from our side!”

Louis’ decision, infuriatingly enough, was the best possible option for her.
Banishing Subaru from the『Hall of Memories』and sending him back to reality. And entrusting opposing him to her siblings Ley and Roy instead of herself.
If the Sin Archbishops of『Gluttony』could choose to share or not to share a meal, then Louis would be able to part ways from the worst platter named Natsuki Subaru. Whether her siblings would bear the same anguish as herself or not, that itself was something her current self did not know.

Subaru: “ーーGh.”

It was difficult to hold out.
With not a single thing to latch onto, and with even the ground to stand firm on becoming vague, Subaru was hopelessly the weaker side in this『Hall of Memories』.

Subaru: “If you, don’t like me doing it…… then if you settle this, by yourself……”

Louis: “We won’t go along with that ~tsu! Even if you try to make us kill you, it’s futile! You intend to take us to task through『Return by Death』! We won’t let you! Onii-chan and nii-sama, will utterly eat away onii-san! That is, the condition for our victory ~tsu!!”

Unraveling her fangs, Louis scowled at Subaru who tried to hold his ground. He could no longer oppose her will. Comprehending that, he let in a deep inhale.
Afterwards, Subaru’s black eyes directly pierced through Louisーー,

Louis: “ーーEek.”

Subaru: “If your siblings, are your final rope to rely on, then I understand. ーーI will slash that rope and make you pay. You’d better remember this, Louis Arneb.”

With a single finger pointed towards the frightened, cowering Louis, he resumed.

Subaru: “Everything distressful, everything painful, bear all of it by yourself. ーーDon’t run away, from the『Memories』.”

Humiliation and repentance, were all『Memories』necessary to shape the current oneself.
It’s entirety had become food for the human named Natsuki Subaru, and the Natsuki Subaru constructed by its entirety had reached this point after having stockpiled many a『Death』.
If Natsuki Subaru was amazing, then that was because humiliation and repentance let him be so.

Subaru: “With that being said, I don’t really want even a part of that shame.”

That was what Subaru whispered whilst being expelled out from a space to its edge, which wasn’t present in the world, with his field of vision turning white as if nothing had been there.
And, the『Hall of Memories』came untiedーー,

 

 

△▼△▼△▼△

 

And, within the『Hall of Memories』wherein the form of the dreadful lunatic had been erased, Louis Arneb took in a deep, deep shivering inhale, and confirmed her own pure life.

Louis: “Ah, ah, a~h……”

Her throat, shivering, her lungs, shivering, her heart, shivering, her soul, shivering.
Even Louis, who had indulged in every possible variety of『Memories』, couldn’t comprehend an existence that repulsive. What was truly frightening about that thing, was it’s inconceivable spirit.

Louis: “Wh, y……”

Whether she could remain as per ordinary, she did not know.
Louis had become a part of that thing, and prior to that had eaten that thing’s『Memories』thoroughly down to its roots. Slowly crunching the『Memories』without exception, she had masticated them.
That deed itself was roundabout, as if peeling off the layers of an onion’s skin one by one, a code of action separating that which yielded new life upon each instance of『Death』into greater than twenty sections.
Before having experienced『Return by Death』, that deed of dividing those『Memories』into several portions then eating them was something that made her heart pound with the notion of it being a new experience, but now all she found was incomprehensible fear.

In the first place, why couldn’t the『Memories』prior to the occurrence of the『Summoning Into the Different World』or whatever be robbed.
Originally, the power of the Authority of『Gluttony』was supposed to eat away all of the『Memories』of the subject until the moment of birth. Yet, what could be robbed from that thing were merely the『Memories』of this one year.
As if Od Lagna did not assess the『Memories』previous to that, abhorred them, or otherwiseーー,

???: “ーーListen listen, um, isn’t this a bit from what was supposed to be?”

Louis: “ーーーー”

Suddenly, a voice echoed in the『Hall of Memories』supposed to have been left alone, and Louis turned around, astonished. However, her doubts were immediately dispelled.
The one who stood before Louis’ line of sight, who had turned back, wasーー,

Louis: “Us……”

‘Louis’: “That’s right, us. Because we got the short end of the stick, its us who had been waiting here in vain. Which one will play the trial version of the greatest life by becoming onii-san, was the play environment properly arranged? Came here to report that, is it?”

Whilst saying so, smiling at Louis was the existence exactly the same herーー『Louis』.
Dividing the Witch Factor originally supposed to be one into two, having segregated the『Soul』despite being the same personage, in the utmost correct sense, another one of herself.
The greatest factor which made that possible must be that Louis did not fear the deterioration of her self, an existence of mere『Soul』devoid of a flesh body.

That『Louis』, who was one more of oneself, did not share that personal experience unlike Louis. That is why, Louis found the genuinely smiling form of『Louis』, to be unordinarily distant.

‘Louis’: “ーー? What happened, us. Making such an expression huh. First of all, what about onii-san? Being here means, got into this place by reading the『Book of the Dead』again, no?”

Louis: “ーーーー”

‘Louis’: “Besides, what’s with this being all crouched since earlier? Why be so curled up? Hey, hey hey, the goal was properly accomplished, right? Though we failed on this end, we were supposed to have fulfilled the role, isn’t it. Amazing amazing, got in pretty cleanly huh. Onii-san geez, didn’t take notice at all. Of the us inside of himself!”

Clasping her hands energetically,『Louis』reminisced the forbidden tryst.
Of course, unneeding of a necessity to mention it, Louis was aware of that affair.
It referred to back when the『Hall of Memories』got connected to when thinking of investigating the way of capturing the atrocious swordsman, Reid Astrea.『Louis』then once again came in contact with that thing, which had forgotten anything and everything, and had the circumstances permitted, intended to eat that thing including Louis, who was a Witch Factor.
Though it was an experiment to see if that thing’s Authority, including the integrated Witch Factor, could possibly be successfully plundered by doing that, it failed due to an unexpected hindrance.

She surely never mused having to taste a counterattack by one of the eaten『Memories』.
However, reflecting on it now, had the hindrance not entered there, then Louis might have become one with that thing by this time.
With that thingーー,

‘Louis’: “Hey hey, what happened, us! Talk about various more stuff, let us hear it! Saw it, right? Heard it, right? Scented it, right? Touched it, right? Tasted it, right? ーーNatsuki Subaru’s Authority eh!”

Louis: “ーーDon’t mention that thing’s name!!”

‘Louis’: “ーー~tsu.”

Resuming her merry words,『Louis』stretched her hand. The moment that arm attempted to touch her own shoulder, Louis shook off the arm in accompaniment of exasperation.
Violently, powerfully, with as much rejection as possible, she did, to the arm of her literal other half.

‘Louis’: “……Huh?”

Naturally, unbeknownst to the meaning behind her other half’s action, bafflement was yielded forth in『Louis’』facial expression.
However, Louis did not possess the leeway to look back onto that expression of『Louis’』. Louis hugged the shoulder『Others』had tried touching, and stepped backwards whilst shaking her head in rejection.

Louis: “No! Nonono! Don’t touch! Don’t come near!”

She was astonished, by her own cognisance.
However, it was her own sensation. It would not turn traitor, like the hell named oneself.

She comprehended.『Louis』before her eyes, who possessed the same face as herself, who had undergone the same experiences as herself.
The existence supposed to understand her『Soul』ーー at present, it was someone other for Louis.

It was unknown, what others will do. They will not protect Louis.
They could become Louis’ cause of death. Baleful enemies who would naught but kill Louis, who did not want to die.

Louis: “Don’t come! Don’t come near don’t come near don’t come near don’t come near ~tsu! Don’t come close! Don’t touch u~s!”

‘Louis’: “ーーーー”

Hugging her own body, she was unable to do anything but react in exactly the same way as when she had confronted that thing.
For Louis, who had continued moulding her self through the『Memories』of others in this space devoid of the freedom to even look at a mirror, the sense of foreignity she felt towards『Louis』, who possessed the same face as herself, was stronger than the unskillful others.
Witnessing Louis repeat denial and rejection like this,『Louis』reciprocatively shifted her gaze along with the hand that had been shaken off. And,

‘Louis’: “Huh? What’s with that.”

Pertaining to Louis’ rejective response,『Louis』clenched her hand that had been shaken off. She then looked down onto Louis with a terribly thirstful voice, biting and clanking her fangs.

‘Louis’: “What’s with that. What’s with that what’s with that, what does this mean. With what purpose, with what idea, with what plan with what thought, hey!?”

Louis: “Ee~k ~tsu.”

‘Louis’: “This is different from what was supposed to be ~tsu! What happened, us!? What’s, with that reaction! Attitude! Response!”

The rejected『Louis』enraged, closing in towards the huddled Louis. Crouching down before Louis, who knelled her throat upon the vigour,『Louis』grasped the hair of her cowering other half.
Subsequently making her raise her face through sheer force, the two with the same faces glared into each other at a distance that their breaths entangled.

‘Louis’: “It sure is strange. Strange, how strange, isn’t it strange, pretty strange, it is strange, as it’s strange, quite strange, as it’s too strange, as we’re saying it’s strange!!”

Louis: “ーーーー”

‘Louis’: “What about the strategy? The plan went well, didn’t it? The plan was to become a Factor and get inside onii-san, and put wickedness to work, wasn’t it? It was a job really well done. Onii-san was frightened, after all! Onii-san completely thought, that『Natsuki Subaru』was the closest person to him!”

Louis made no response to the plan which『Louis』recited and its progress.
The truth was, Louis and『Louis’』 plans had transitioned smoothly. Louis experienced『Return by Death』inside Subaru and stimulated the separation of Subaru and『Natsuki Subaru』by putting wickedness to work.
And whilst staying behind in the『Hall of Memories』,『Louis』shall eat Subaru who had differentiated himself from『Natsuki Subaru』and make the Authority her own belonging. A single step had remained.
And even if that had not went wellーー,

‘Louis’: “ーーNo matter how many times, tens of times, hundreds of times! The arrangement was to challenge until the Authority of『Return by Death』has been looted, isn’t it! What’s wrong after failing a bit! It’ll be fine by stealing onii-san’s『Memories』again and trying again no matter how many times it takes. Let’s mutually exchange roles and challenge, no matter how many times how many times it takes! Failures, can be recovered from!”

The one to assimilate as a Witch Factor, and the one to stand by in the『Hall of Memories』, she had intended to accomplish the complete extortion of the Authority by exchanging roles and regardless how many times it would take, without getting tired of it.
And yetーー,

‘Louis’: “ーーAnd yet, to do something like rejecting us, what happened huh!”

Louis: “NOOOOooooーー ~tsu!”

‘Louis’: “Wo, ah!”

With strength poured into the arm which had grasped her hair, Louis gave rise to a screech in agony and fear. Afterwards she shoved the chest of『Louis』who was before her eyes, making her other half rumble in pain and fall onto her back.
Mutually glaring at each other with eyes of disbelief, a painful silence fell upon the white world. And, whilst Louis remained silent,『Louis』widened her eyes and,

‘Louis’: “It can’t be…… aiming to monopolise the Authority?”

Louis: “ーーーー”

‘Louis’: “Since the Authority of『Return by Death』was obtained successfully, erasing onii-san immediately and aiming to enjoy it by oneselves? Leaving us as is, too.”

Louis: “T-That’s wrong ~tsu!”

Louis bellowed before the frozen『Louis』, who had painted a picture of repulsive misgivings in astonishment, in shock. That was not true at all. It was improbable. She had not thought in the slightest bit, to monopolise this.
Something like this, if it was possible to throw it away then she wished to throw it away. However, she could not do so.
For these were the『Memories』of nobody, but『Louis Arneb』. Oneself’s own『Memories』were impossible to be erased. Impossible to be stolen. Impossible to be taken in and out.

‘Everything distressful, everything painful, bear all of it by yourself. ーーDon’t run away, from the『Memories』.’

Louis: “Eek.”

So she had been told by that thing just previously.
What was experienced by oneself, what path was walked by oneself, could not be erased. Having certainly taken birth within Louis, that was the history of『Louis Arneb』herself.

‘Louis’: “This is no joke ~tsu! Something like this, as if it can be excused……!”

She had wanted to become happy. She had wanted to attain a joyful life that was hers alone.
However, the life solely belonging to her which she had attained in an unexpected form smashed Louis’ ■ーー『Heart』into pieces, and wounded her to an irrecoverable extent.
『Louis』was unable to comprehend, Louis fearing the wounds and abrasion of her heart.

‘Louis’: “As if we’ll let someone like you, monopolise our means to become happy!”

Louis: “That’s wrong! That’s wrong that’s wrong that’s wrong that’s wro~o~o~o~ng! That’s not it! That is not it! That’s definitely not i~t!”

‘Louis’: “As if we can believe that! We never thought, that we’d be betrayed by us. As expected of us, isn’t it, us! That’s right. We get it, we get it. Hm hm, we do get it!”

Louis: “No! Don’t get it at all! Don’t get it at all! Don’t get our feelings at all ~tsu!”

‘Louis’: “No, do get it indeed! After all, it is about us. That’s right. If it’s for the sake of becoming happy then we’d be willing to do anything, and must do anything! Joyfulness, is something which keeps on keeps on declining by the slightest thing!”

『Louis』bounced and joined her hands before her slim chest. And with a magnificent, broad smile, she directed a sidelong glance towards Louis who articulated her rejection in a tearful voice.

‘Louis’: “What if, we carelessly schemed wickedness? If that’s done to us by us, who have attained『Return by Death』, then no matter how much the struggle we can never win, isn’t it! Amazing! Really put thought into it, isn’t it!”

Louis: “Don’t want to die! We don’t want to die! Don’t want to die don’t want to die don’t want to die~e~e~e~!”

‘Louis’: “Don’t say such utterly obvious lies! Don’t want to die? Why? How come? If it’s unneeded then hand it over to us! What a filthy desire to monopolise…… can’t even think that it’s us!”

Louis: “ーーーー”

From『Louis’』words, she was repudiated being the same existence.
At that instant, Louis felt like she heard the note of something inside of her thirsting, cracking, shattering. She did know, what had been present inside of her which shattered.
Though she did not knowーー,

‘Louis’: “ーーNatsuki Subaru belongs to us. This, thieving cat.”

Despite not knowing what that thing was whatsoever, it was condescendingly called as a belonging.
Even though the only one who truly comprehended what thing was, was only herself, how arbitrary a thing to say.

ーーThe only one who truly comprehended that thing, was herself alone.

Louis: “ーーThe only one who understands Natsuki Subaru is us. This, foolish girl.”

That thing was fearsome. That thing was repulsive. That thing, was abhorrent.
That is whyーー,

‘Louis’: “ーーLet us taste it tooーー ~tsu!!”

『Louis』pounced, advancing in order to purloin the『Memories』which made Louis, Louis.
To hand that over, would resort to give the meaning of it being the『Death』of Louis Arneb.

Giving the meaning, of『Death』. ーーGiving the meaning, of the world witnessed by that thing.

Louis: “Ah, a~a~a~a~a~a~hーー ~tsu!!”

Screamed. Screamed. Screaming, screaming, screaming, she screamed.
Continuing to scream, whilst screaming, whilst resuming screaming, whilst continuing to raise a screaming voiceーー,

 

“ーーDon’t want to die.”

 

An exceedingly fierce, meaningless conflict commenced in the『Hall of Memories』.
A conflict with nobody watching, nobody interested.

Commenced, and ended. ーーA conflict, devoid of victors.

 

△▼△▼△▼△

 

???: “ーーIce Brand Arts!!”

The instant those words were fired, she tightly gripped to sensation born within her palm and swung it completely. What had been generated in her hands was a longsword shaped with ice and it’s cutting ability was far greater than that of some incomplete iron sword.
Though she had only just begun practicing the sword, moving her body was her specialty. Swinging the ice sword atop the extended line, she attempted to land a fatal blow upon her opponent whilst sealing off his routes to escape.
Howeverーー,

???: “Hahaha~! You’re doing i~t! But, this is far from too far from being enough to land, gee~z!”

???: “ーー~hk!”

The enemy, with his long hair waving about, evaded her fatal strike by seemingly crawling on the ground.
Glaring with his sharp cuspids unraveled, was the Sin Archbishop of『Gluttony』who named himself as Ley Batenkaitos.
Upon hearing the name of Sin Archbishop, something akin to dislike swelled up within her.
That was because approximately a month ago, clashing with a great number of Sin Archbishops in the Watergate City Priestella had led to a large number of settlements, as well as a large number of settlements being delayed, at any rate, led to mountain worth of grave happenings.

Plentiful emotions of sadness or bitterness had been born forth.
Their elimination or solution had yet not been achieved, that is why everyone was doing their best, and yet.

???: “Why, do you all act like this andーー!”

Ley: “Why? Why indeed? Why we wonder? Why is it why? Why must it be why we wonder? Why is it what we certainly wonde~r? Why must what be why? Why is what why is why is why eh!”

His teasing words possessed no echo of seriousness, her opponent did not intend to give a proper response.
Sensing that, she powerfully stiffened her cheeks. Being able to converse would be the best. However, should the opponent not comply with conversation, then she shall not hesitate any further.
That resolute exchange, certainly occurred with clarity during that moment.

???: “ーーIcicle Line.”

Ley: “Wow.”

Accompanying the chant, a sound of freezing space echoed from her rear. Countless ice stakes with sharp tips were born in the air, signifying they were ready to be fired.
Gazing at that, Ley’s composure, yet, remained unchanged. With no strong feelings for that, she merely commenced the offensive abiding by her frozen fighting spirit.

“ーーーー”

The count of the fired ice stakes was close to, but no greater than, a hundred.
Submerging the aisle seemingly constructed of stone, the dust of the ice which had impacted the floor, the walls, the ceiling fluttered about and the space frozen white brought immense damage upon the one who had been immensely hit.
Howeverーー,

Ley: “Sorry, onee-san. We’re tired of seeing that…… is something we won’t say, but we have seen it. See, because we are genius after a~ll, we don’t think an attack that has already been seen once will hit!”

Swinging the daggers fastened to both of his hands, Ley laughed, having outdone the terrific attack of ice.
She inhaled in astonishment, witnessing his talent and skill, and having withstood and outdone it as a matter of fact, as he stood completely unwounded. However, if he had outdone it once, then twice, thrice, if that still won’t work, then even more.

Ley: “You’re thinking you’ll be able to win if you do it a hundred times? It will not reach through even after you do it a thousand times, you know?”

???: “Then I’ll just do it ten thousand times! I won’t let you go where everyone is!”

Ley: “Ahaha ~tsu, well that sure is a large scale! Good gracious, how outrageou~s!”

Putting his hand on his forehead, Ley let out a sigh divided into disgust and irritation. Whilst viewing that, she quietly abided by her own words.
Though she had pronounced those words whilst simply going with the flow, she must abide by them.

Thus, the moment she attempted to step ahead and fulfill thatーー,

???: “ーーLey Batenkaitos!!”

“ーーーー”

From the rear echoed a voice in the aisle that was neither her’s nor Ley’s, leading her to thoughtlessly halt her feet. Upon looking back after being immediately lured by the voice, a shadow showed itself by the corner of the path and leapt into her field of her vision.
That was a black-haired youth with a somewhat nasty look of eyes. He rushed into the battlefield with a gallant expression, and was looking at Ley and herself, who were sparring in the aisle.

???: “Ah……”

Suddenly, “oh no” was the thought which surfaced in her innermost mind.
Though she must say something, a vacuum was born in her words. This was due to the various emotions which overflowed in face of the rushing youth.
However, before『Bafflement』was yielded in front of the youth, she hurriedly moved her lips,

???: “Its dangerous so wait! Um, you may not, know about me, but he is the enemy! Leave this place to me! Even though you may not, know about me!”

She wished for him to leave this place, and for him to not think of herself much.
At the very least, right now at the present instant, should she begin considering things aside from fighting, she would certainly burst into tears and cry.
She did not wish to show her weak side like this and trouble everyone.
And yetーー,

 

???: “ーーIts alright, Emilia-tan.”

 

The youth who had rushed in called her name.
Emotions she could not concern herself with, like anxiety, like sorrow, strummed and sprang within her chest due to simply that, for which she tried her best to make sure they did flow out.
After allーー,

 

Subaru: “ーーMy name is Natsuki Subaru. Emilia-tan’s one and only knight!”

 

Right now,『Emilia’s』heart was beating with such warmth, such warmth.

 

151 thoughts on “Arc 6 – Chapter 76, “The Hell Bearing the Name of Oneself””

  1. Omg here is now the mc damn what an amazing last part ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ emilia tan is going to cry i feel her
    Thank you ringo san (っ˘̩╭╮˘̩)っ
    Truly thank you •́ ‿ ,•̀

            1. I couldn’t help but notice your attempt at a correction is full of grammatical errors. Nice comma splice by the way.

              Your unique willingness to impose your excessive stupidity on others is rather impressive. Are you the Sin Archbishop of Mental Retardation?

              1. It’s really hilarious how you’re trying so hard to sound intelligent when you don’t even know what a comma splice is. Also, name literally just one grammatical error that I made beside the one you wrongly pointed out.

            2. Relax this is a place of enjoyment and happiness where one does not insult each others comments. If you want to do that go to Reddit or something.

  2. This chapters is confirmation that the evil ‘Natsuki Subaru’ who killed Meili and broke Subaru out of the ice prison was indeed, Rui Arneb.

    Also

    LEEETS GOOOO!!! OUR BOY SUBARU IS BACK AT 100%, READY TO KICK GLUTTONOUS ASS!!!

    1. No? Rui surely said that she was inside subaru with amnésia as a witch factor, so we can affirm that it was subaru almost all the time exept when subaru was possessed by rui and kill meili….. sorry about my write by the way, i am not a native

      1. It’s me again. i’m sorry i thought you were saying that rui was subaru all the time, but you were only talking that rui possessed subaru only when he killed meilli and when he escaped the ice prision too.

    2. more like ready to get his ass kicked as soon as the cut scene end. right now Subaru is protected by the cinematic, but as soon as he skip it it’s over !

  3. “ーーIts alright, Emilia-tan.”

    I’ve been waiting for this moment for so long. For it to come when she’s lost her name and started to lose hope, it’s perfect.

  4. Translators “Hahaha~! You’re doing i~t!,” translator Is good, i think it’s good because it is good, good is good, good deserves thanks to TY ~tsu!”

  5. YAY!!! I am glad that the final chapters are being translated finally! Good work on clearing up the mis-translations from earlier and moving things forward again! Excited to see the end of this Arc (and hopefully the start of the next soon!)

    Has the author even begun work on Arc 7?

    1. The last WN chapter that the author released (except for the traditional April’s Fool chapter) was Arc 6 Chapter 79 which came out on 2019-11-22. Arc 6 hasn’t even finished yet.

        1. They were working on Warlords of Sigrdrifa: Rusalka (a light novel prequel to an up-and-coming anime) which released volumes in May and July, they released the sixth Re:Zero side-story collection in July, they’ve also likely been working with the anime production team to an extent, and they’ve needed to adapted WN to LN in volumes 22 and 23 which came out in March and July respectively.

          1. I also don’t think he wants to release the ending before the anime finishes airing this season. Mostly because Rem may be back soon and it may erase part of the tension.

            1. Timeline of the anime considered, wouldn’t be at all surprised if he waits all the way until Feb 2 (Rem’s and Ram’s birthday). Hopefully we don’t have to wait that long, though.

  6. Just want to thank all of you translators for your hard work, it’s thank to you that I get to experience this amazing work after all.

    That last part felt amazing! Kinda like popping your head out of the water after holding your breath for too long, I’m so excited to see how the arc continues to develop into what is probably it’s final phase!

  7. ugh kinda depressed rn but the light novel is great!…imma curl up in a ball and wait until a new chapter’s released..

  8. Finally, after waiting x month, now i can read the translated version of “Hell Called Myself”…
    Thanks translator-san~

  9. Thanks Mr. Translator. I have been waiting for one year to read Re:Zero since Translation Chicken stopped translating. but now I finally get to complete this amazing Web Novel. Thank you sooo much.

    1. She seems completely incapable of love, so there’s little chance for redemption. That’s what the entire thing with the [Heart] was about. The three Gluttonies together also probably have one of – if not THE – highest bodycounts in the story, so there’s that too… They don’t deserve second chances, of which they’ve had plenty (after tasting the anguish and moral views of all their victims).

      1. It’s more likely that rather than offering to save her Subaru will simply offer to “take her outside” by absorbing the Witch Factor of Gluttony.

  10. Finally!!!

    Thank you! It’s great to finally read this chapter with a proper translation.

    Subaru might have missed the chance to acquire another loli.
    Speaking of which, am I the only one who felt genuinely bad for Louis despite all the things she’d done?

    I mean, there are a lot of people who did unspeakable things not knowing any better and turned around. Meilli did some pretty bad stuff too, you know. Maybe it was traumatic enough, since she even rejected her ‘other self’? Guess it may depend on which ‘self’ wins in the Hall of Memories in the end.

    And the ending is pretty amazing but… Who is Emilia?

    I’ll see myself out after this one.

    1. The reason it’s difficult to feel sorry for her is that she has no empathy for other people, despite experiencing the lives of so many people to do have empathy. She even refused to try to return the memories after being directly confronted by Subaru. Meili was misguided by the people who raised her, but Rui turned out how she did as soon as she experienced eating another person’s memories. And she has had infinitely more time and chances to change her ways than Meili.

    2. they both loose. since to absorb memories luois2 must fuse with louis1 and share the ainful experience you see. you cannot rob yourself of your own memories

      1. I think they erased each other, cause her memories are the source of her existence, and plundering her memories means plundering her life/existence and louis2 gets erased, since louis1 and louis2 are the same existence divided into two , if one is erased the other is erased too.

        1. They are not the same existence, this chapter just illustrated that well. And even if HoM Louis will eat SubaruAmnesia-Louis, she won’t feel the same about these memories, since she didn’t experience them herself. She would be “amazing-amazing, i want this authority”.

  11. Thanks for the translation! I found a few small changes I think work better. If you have a chance, please look them over and apply them if they make sense.

    “Tightly clenching the fist he had been gazing,” should be “Tightly clenching the fist he had been gazing at,”
    “And upon Subaru’s head-on declaration that we won’t save her,” should be “And upon Subaru’s head-on declaration that he won’t save her,”
    “ーーListen listen, um, isn’t this a bit from what was supposed to be?” should be “ーーListen listen, um, isn’t this a bit different from what was supposed to be?”
    “Being here means, got into this place” should be “Being here means, he got into this place”

  12. thanks for the chapter. now with a good translation it easier to understand the outcome of louis1 vs louis2 battle than with google translate. i think they returned to be 1 and louis is now terrified

    1. Erm no I think Louis is erased totally 100% reason why she eaten her own name “with next attack it means death of Louis arneb” and second part “theres no victor theres no fight theres no interest”
      As if louis disappeared “vanished”
      Fitting for louis to eat her self I think considering she is named after the great rabbit (shizle hare is star name other name for it be Louis I believe)

  13. Thank you for the mea– NEXT CHAPTER
    It’s an amazing chapter
    Really hope author finishes arc 6 and starts arc 7 so the translation team would be faster since they don’t wanna rush when a whole bunch comes out lmao

  14. Terrific! This is truly a magnificent work of translation! Thank you for all your diligence, long and hard spent hours looking and sifting through texts and context!

  15. Thank you for the chapter, i hope you guys have the time to translate the others, but don’t overburden yourselves my dudes

    1. yeah
      and it’s not complete, who knows how many more chapters are gonna be released
      currently kadokawa has him by the balls because rem is gonna wake up soon, so kadokawa wants that big rem money in their ln first, then tappei can release more chapters

    2. Anime work(and a lot), light novels got released more frequently, there were re:zero games, re:zero extras, the original anime that will release in October, etc

      Basically, he had a lot more to do and less time for the web novel

  16. OoOOoOh~~ Great chapter! Thank you very much for translating! Also… Any ideas whens the next one? ( ̄ω ̄;)

    1. The translator is taking a break currently, and was going to have a pretty busy early August, so there’s still a bit of a wait left.

  17. Wow i cant believe im caught up. I started reading this the day before season 2 episode 1 released and now im caught up. It was a rollercoaster of me skipping boring scenes(liliana, and as much as i love him, wilhelms and theresias scenes). So glad we moved away from the PDF girl and got this. Much better quality. Less personalized and more true to the original. Thank you guys so much. I loved reading the comments “whens the next come out” and then the admins were always rude and shit but anyways that always made me laugh. Cant wait for the next few chapters to finish up this arc! Take your time but hurry up!

    1. You’re super fast, I started reading from arc 4 last year and took me until last month to catch up to the latest chapters

  18. Thanks for the translation, great chapter !
    Subaru our real goat, and Emilia’s perfect reaction at the end, I’ve been waiting for it for so long..
    HYPE !
    Thank you so much Ringo !

  19. Been an emotional rollercoaster, and hopefully Rem is coming back as well. Keep up the good work, amazing translation!

  20. Just caught up after like 2 months of reading and it’s mega sad knowing that the author’s probably not gonna finish the arc until a l o t later, but still

    LEEEEEETS

    FUUUUUUCKING

    GOOOOOOOO

  21. Ugbufu- can’t wait, want to slam my head to a wall while- actually don’t wanna aaaahhhhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha

              1. Awww… Either way I’m 19 male Philippines, call my number if your interested for being my freind its 09459752889

  22. My boi Subaru gonna fucking annihilate Batenkaitos then when they defeat Reid, all SA of Gluttony will be dead so Rem will wake up (gonna cry my fucking eyes out when Rem wakes up to realise Subaru really has become a worthy hero)

  23. YOU’RE ACTUALLY JOKING MAN! YOU CAN’T TELL ME I HAD TO GET TO THIS HYPE MOMENT AT THIS TIME WHEN NO MORE HAS BEEN TRANSLATED?
    COME ONNNNNNNNNNNNN THIS IS SO INCONVENIENT AND IT’S KILLING MEEEEEEEEE!
    Ah well, anyway, I hope to read the next chapter soon, keep up the good work guys.

    1. Uhhhhh also, do you guys have some sort of notification thing for this? Like is there some sort of account system? Cause I see quite a lot of people with pfps

  24. Hey Everyone!!! .(SPOILER MAYBEE). These are just my thoughts. About Subaru, like we all know he may/may not have a connection with the watchtower based on shaulas reaction ‘calling subaru master and all’. But i found a connection. While i was going through Arc 4 or before, at some point,in i think Rem IF story, there was a reference for the name ‘Subaru’ as ‘Paleaides’ when rem and subaru were talking about what their children ‘Rigel’ and ‘Spica’ were named after which were names of stars.(NOTE:-there is no similarity in the story of REM IF and the Web Novel as REM IF is a side story completely unrelated to the WN). So as we know ‘The Sage’s tower’ or otherwise known as ‘Paleaides tower’ matches Subaru’s other ”star referred” name Paleaides. (SORRY IF THE NAME ‘PALEAIDES’ IS INCORRECT). This means that subaru and the tower have a connection somewhere xD. We’ll see. Take care everyone. See you later.

    1. Pleiades is just the Greek word for Subaru and I think this has been mentioned in the novel various time. So if you use Japanese then the name of tower is Subaru’s watchtower

        1. I believe since mid August, don’t know when they will be back but they do have jobs and families as well as translating this on the side

  25. Take all the time and rest you need, we’re on a tough time now, and I’ll follow your translation until the novel is finished cause I’m so into this literature.

  26. Update: Our translator is unfortunately still extremely busy this upcoming week. He will likely start translating the chapter next weekend. Still no ETA on a release though.

  27. The sin archbishops are supposed to be personification of insanity themselves, but Louis got completely broken just with the deaths “Natsuki Subaru” exepirenced in the tower, let alkne the mire painful deaths like the time Rem and Ram, who Subaru cared deeply for, mercilessly killed him, dief from a curse, frozen and decapitated, got his body stole by Petelgeuse, eaten alive by the rabbits, killed himself to avoid being assimilate with the thing Envy swallowed, the maddening deaths by Sirius and the miasma… just a very nice way to say how brutal Subaru’s obstacles were

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