Arc 5, Chapter 30 – “Tiger and Cat Under the Moon”

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All rights belong to Tappei Nagatsuki, the original author of the Re:Zero series. This is an English translation of the free web novel which is available at:

http://ncode.syosetu.com/N2267BE/

Translated by:

  • Nanashi-tan
  • Phantaminum

Proofread by:

  • Phantaminum
  • SSCaide

Art Source:

  • Setowi

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???: [I’m so sorry, I wasn’t expecting guests, so the house isn’t very tidy.]

Mimi: [Hmm~! We don’t mind~! It looks clean~! Very clean~! Mimi’s room looks a lot more chaotiiiiic~!]

???: [Ah, ah, that’s no good.]

The woman casually stroked Mimi, who sat on the sofa, kicking her legs and looking very comfortable. Mimi made happy noises, completely relaxed around the woman.

Immersed in this scene, Garfiel looked silently at the woman. Her long blond hair flowed to her waist, her skin was fair like snow, her slim body retained a woman’s curves, and her soft face displayed a pair of clear, calm emerald-green eyes.

Her youthful appearance suited that of a woman in her mid-twenties, but Garfiel knew that she should be in her mid-thirties. The fact that it did not match up to Garfiel’s expectations was precisely the source of his confusion.

???: [Gorgeous Tiger-san, does tea not match your tastes? I’m sorry, I didn’t even think to ask what you’d like to drink…]

The woman―― a woman who claimed to be Reala Thompson, frowned at the silent Garfiel. He was shaken back into awareness by her voice. He looked down at the cup of tea that had been served in front of him, and hurriedly grabbed it.

Garfiel: [No, no, my amazin’ self was just bein’ a bit silly… I’m just thinkin’ that this room’s unusually big, that’s all.]

Reala: [Is that so? My family’s very big, and so is our house… but that makes it hard to clean. It looks like I was careless again.]

Reala accepted Garfiel’s hurried excuse without a trace of doubt, laughing elegantly, putting her hand on her mouth. She was dressed in well-tailored clothing, suitable for living in a mansion that could only be described as large.

Her smile, her sweet tone, everything about her struck Garfiel with nostalgia. However, Reala spoke not a word of Garfiel’s gaze. This detail alone gripped Garfiel’s heart with pain.

The woman who claimed to be Reala Thompson looked exactly like the woman who had been imprinted clearly into his mind―― Reshia Tinzel, Garfiel’s mother.

Garfiel’s separation from his mother had happened shortly after his birth, back when he had no self-awareness, so obviously his memories of his mother were scant. Even so, Garfiel knew every detail of her face, after seeing her in that detestable Tomb where the Trial had been hosted. There, he witnessed his separation from his mother.

Her face, her voice, her love, Garfiel knew them all from the Trial. And that same Trial had shown him the unfortunate death that reached her shortly after her departure. So, to Garfiel, seeing his mother again was an impossible dream.

But if that was so, then who was this woman in front of him?

Reala: [Mimi-san, your ears look so soft. Would it be possible for me to touch them?]

Mimi: [Please go ahead~!]

Reala happily reached out to Mimi, who tilted her head, and stroked Mimi’s ears with a look of contentment.

Mimi’s smile was one only a little girl could wear. They were an odd pair, a tiny beastman and a suspicious thug-like demi-human, but they had been invited in without a second thought. This woman had simply no sense of wariness.

Such attitudes were, to Garfiel, all associated with motherliness.

His mother Reshia had been quite the unfortunate woman. Her parents had lost everything to debt, and had sold her to a group of slave traders, who were in turn ambushed by demi-human bandits. They had made Reshia their plaything.

Somewhere along the way, she had become pregnant with Frederica, and as his mother’s stomach swelled, the bandits simply abandoned her. After that, she was taken by a different band of thieves and spent a long time with them.

His older sister Frederica had grown up in that group of bandits, and remembered those times. Although she did not like to talk about it, the fact that Reshia had departed as soon as she became pregnant with Garfiel, indicated that it had been a rather poor environment.

Suffering misfortune after misfortune, Reshia wandered around with her daughter, while carrying a child. Fortunately, she soon was rescued by Roswaal, a pompous noble. He had made her a proposal―― he would take them to Sanctuary, where they would be given food, safety and shelter. In Sanctuary, Garfiel was born, and Ryuzu became his guardian.

Life had treated his mother in a way that could only be summed up as “cruel”.

However, his mother’s personality was unknown to those who only heard her stories. Those who really knew his mother would never give her life such an unfortunate evaluation.

Ryuzu: [Ah, Reshia. That girl was always inexplicably, weirdly optimistic, always lookin’ towards the future. Despite sufferin’ through painful days where she could’ve died, she’d always say, “Maybe something nice’ll happen tomorrow. Even if today’s hard, tomorrow may be better.” Like a lil’ child, she always looked forward to the lil’ happy things in life.]

Frederica: [Our honored mother was… she may have been dismissed as a foolish woman by other… people. To be honest, I believe that she never really grasped lessons on how to best survive… But she was an incredibly wonderful person. That is one thing I can say for certain. I love our mom with all my heart, and I am happy to be her daughter.]

Roswaal: [Is this about your mother, Reshia-san? Riiiiiight, although I never had too many chaaaaances to chat with her face to face, but… she was a strange person. Or maybe it’s better to say incredible? She was muuuuch more sensitive to happiness than most people. She was always cheerful, finding happiness in eeeeven the worst of situations. Yeeeep, that’s not something I disliiiiiiked.]

Ryuzu, Frederica, and even Roswaal all spoke fondly of her. Within Sanctuary, anyone who had known his mother said the same thing. She was someone who was always relaxed and happy.

If that had not been the case, she would not have left to look for Garfiel’s father foolishly, who had more than likely encountered misfortune. And then she had immediately suffered another misfortune and died, and what happiness did she get?

——He had never found the answer as to where his mother’s happiness was.

Garfiel: [If I couldn’t find it, I should’ve just given up…]

Nails dug into the palm of his hand as he clenched his fist, to the point blood was about to gush. He should have given up. But he had never understood that. It had taken a long time, but he had finally grown to accept it.

This was plainly the case, but why, now, had she appeared again? As she had always been, with a carefree and cheerful attitude that told him that she did not know him?

Garfiel: [————]

In order to keep her from noticing, he had resigned himself to secretly observing her expressions and behaviors.

Nothing felt unnatural. It was strikingly clear that his mother treated him as a stranger, as if it were completely natural.

Was this her answer?

She had a new life. Unaware of Garfiel, she led her happy life. She had attained happiness like this, by driving away the promises that she had once made.

“I don’t care to know about your affairs”, was that his mother’s answer to——

Fred: [Motheeeeeeer.]

Sister: [Mom, I’m hungry.]

Garfiel had been silent as Mimi and Reala played around. Brother and sister joined them in the living room after going to their rooms to change.

The sister cast a stern look at Garfiel, and then immediately huddled close to her mother.

Sister: [Mom, tell the guests to go home, and then we can eat.]

Reala: [As an older sister, what are you saying? Gorgeous-san and Mimi took care of Fred when he nearly drowned. We are indebted to them.]

Sister: [About that, couldn’t it be that that Gorgeous person was the one who did it? So he could come to our house and take advantage of our generosity. Maybe he wants money.]

Reala: [Hey now, that’s going too far. But you’re right, we have to thank him for Fred… Should we give him money?]

Sister: [Mom!?]

The sister, who had realized that her words were about to become the reason for her family’s bankruptcy, flew into a panic. On the other hand, Reala, who failed to grasp the reason for her daughter’s rant, glanced around in confusion.

For Garfiel, that smiley interaction between parent and child made breathing harder than walking barefoot on thorns. Draining his tea in one gulp, Garfiel set his cup down with a clang.

Garfiel: [Since my amazin’ self doesn’t seem to be welcome here, we’ll be leavin’.]

Mimi: [Haauhh? Why~?]

Garfiel: [No particular reason.]

Although Garfiel wanted to leave, Mimi continued to resist. However, as if he had not heard her, Garfiel picked her up. As he stood to go, Reala looked distraught, while her daughter cast a smirk at him.

Well, Garfiel would respect her feelings—— And, with that thought,

Fred: [Don’t go, Gorgeous Tiger…]

Seizing the hem of Garfiel’s pants, the little brother blocked his way. For a second, for reasons unknown to him, Garfiel hesitated to shake off his little hands. But,

Sister: [Fred, honestly, you’re…]

As the younger brother advocated for a suspicious criminal to stay, the older sister placed her hands on her waist in anger. Reala clapped her hands, capturing everyone’s attention before the sister jumped her brother.

Reala: [Everyone, look, it’s not good to not get along. You’re pushing our guests to leave, Fred seems to want them to stay, so don’t force them to do anything, onee-chan.] [1]

Sister: [But, mom…]

Reala: [No buts. Gorgeous-san and Mimi, stay for a while, won’t you? I’d be delighted to share dinner with you, and tonight’s meal is my best dish.]

Fred: [Moooom, you call everything your best dish…]

Reala: [Mhm, shouldn’t that be obvious? Mom always tries her best on every dish for you.]

Everyone present wore a panicked expression towards Reala, who flexed her bicep. But Garfiel moreso than anyone else.

This harmonious atmosphere. It cut deeply into Garfiel’s heart.

Reala’s words cast upon him a unique sense of happiness and helplessness. Accepting her invitation would be the worst possible thing that Garfiel could do.

Garfiel: [Sorry ‘bout yer invitation, but a few of my companions are waitin’ for me. They’ll be worried if we’re late, so we should be headin’ out soon.]

Reala: [――――]

Suppressing the pain in his chest, Garfiel prayed that his voice would not tremble.

At his answer, the sister’s face became stiff, and Reala frowned, her gaze cast down. And,

Reala: [I understand, there is no point in forcing you to stay if it bothers you. It’s like what they say, “Show your guests hospitality and sowaire.”] [2]

Garfiel: [――Hk.]

That exchanged had been the one that had hurt Garfiel the most on this day. Losing to Reinhard in that duel, the initial impact of seeing Reala, looked so miniscule, so utterly trivial, compared to how he was feeling now.

Unconsciously, Garfiel placed a hand close to his chest, as if needing to confirm whether his body had been torn or not. And to that Garfiel’s state――

Mimi: [Garfiel, let’s go.]

Mimi, who had refused to leave until then, gently took Garfiel’s hand in hers and began leading him away. Facing her concern, Garfiel obeyed silently. So, with their hands on the handle of the living room door, ready to go outside,

???: [I’m home! Oh, do we have guests?]

On the other side of the door, appeared the figure of a gentleman sporting a magnificent beard.

He appeared to be a man wearing well-tailored clothing, and gave off an energetic atmosphere. From the tone of his voice, from his facial features, he seemed to be a man of accomplishments.

At that man’s appearance, the children scrambled to their feet with joy. Then, that man would be——

Dad: [Hmm… I haven’t seen this stranger’s face before.]

Fred: [Dad, this is Gorgeous Tiger.]

Sister: [He’s a suspicious person.]

Dad: [What?]

Faced with the sharply contrasting attitudes of his son and daughter, the father tilted his head in distress. He turned to Reala, who stood quietly in the living room.

Under the man’s loving gaze, Reala loosened her cheeks.

Garfiel had hit his limit.

Garfiel: [It ain’t a big deal, we were goin’ anyway.]

Leaving that sentence behind, Garfiel grabbed Mimi and hurriedly pushed his way of out the room, scrambling toward the front door as if running away.

Fred: [Gorgeous Tiger!]

From behind, a sad voice called to Garfiel. However, Garfiel had no response to that call.

Who was Gorgeous? What was Tiger? He was Garfiel, not Gorgeous Tiger. Where was that golden tiger now? A tiger was a strong, powerful creature who could not be shaken by anything.

Where was the tiger now? A real tiger wouldn’t be so affected by such things, would it?

Mimi: [Garf! My hand, it hurts!]

Garfiel: [——Hk.]

Too focused on his thoughts, Garfiel did not notice that cry of pain.

He did not notice until Mimi had broken free of his vice grip, extracting her hand from his nails, which had been digging into her. Her small hand was now swollen and blue.

Garfiel: [S-sorry… my amazin’ self…]

Mimi: [Gar~f, you were weird at that house too. My hand really~ hurts.]

Mimi mumbled quietly, and Garfiel smacked his forehead with his hand.

They fell into an awkward silence as the Watergate City’s moist wind caressed their faces. The sun had fallen from the sky completely, the city shrouded by the light emitted by magic stones. The sunshine on the water’s surface was replaced by light from the magical lamps, but he was in no mood to enjoy that scene’s mysterious and quiet beauty.

???: [Hey, you two, over there!]

Someone approached Garfiel and Mimi with gasping breaths.

Looking up, the magic light revealed the man from before, who had shed his coat. Finally arriving in front of the two, he put his hands on his knees, panting violently.

Dad: [Ah, I finally caught up… This won’t do… I used to be more energetic, but I’m completely out of shape now that I’ve gotten a desk job…]

Garfiel: […Do ya need anythin’ from us?]

Garfiel indicated that he was not interested in the man’s words.

The existence of this man, although not to the degree of Reala’s children, also caused distress in Garfiel. His voice was full of harshness, but the man paid no mind to it, placing his hand on his head, displaying his embarrassment.

Dad: [No, I heard from my wife that you two were benefactors of my son. It’d be completely unjustifiable if I never displayed any gratitude.]

Garfiel: […It’s no big deal, If ya talk so big like that, my amazin’ self’ll be embarrassed.]

Dad: [Everything involving my kids, no matter what, is incredibly important. Saving him from danger makes it even more important. Really, if you need anything at all… Ah, I’m really sorry. My name is Garek, Garek Thompson. Despite how I look, I work at Pristella’s City Hall, so if there’s anything I can do to help you…]

Garfiel: [Really, we’re…]

A man who had a way with words—— Garfiel, who wished to leave as soon as possible, was suddenly at a loss for words when trying to get away from Garek. But if he were indeed Reala’s husband, if he really knew her, then――

Garfiel: [My amazin’ self’s got only one question… would it be okay for ya t’answer?]

Garek: [Yes, anything. No matter what, I’ll do my best to answer.]

Garek responded to Garfiel with a benevolent smile.

The same was true of Reala too, and their son Fred. This entire family was too kind for their own good. Only their daughter had any proper sense of suspicion.

With that in mind, Garfiel was very cautious in his choice of words.

Garfiel: [Yer wife, Reala… What’s her real name?]

Garek: [————]

As soon as Garfiel posed his question, the atmosphere shifted. The smile faded from Garek’s face. He pondered Garfiel’s question silently for a few moments, before replying in a level voice.

Garek: [What do you mean?]

Garfiel: [I mean it literally. It’s like “No matter what, Reid plays a straight game”, right? Playin’ with words ain’t my style. Tell me, yer wife, is her name Reshia instead of Reala?]

Garek: [——Guh.]

Garek’s expression had been unsettled by Garfiel’s straight-to-the-point statement. Garek took a moment to swallow before his voice escaped his mouth.

Garek: [You… Do you know anything about my wife?]

Garfiel: [My amazin’ self also wants to know that.]

Garek: [————]

Garfiel responded sincerely to Garek’s trembling voice.

At those words, Garek fell into silence, as if he were thinking. Waiting for his reply, Garfiel took Mimi’s good hand into his own.

Glancing up at him, she smiled as she usually did.

Garek: […It seems that I should tell you the truth.]

As Garfiel looked sideways at Mimi’s smile, Garek spoke with a sigh.

His voice was weighed with fatigue and powerlessness. Garfiel frowned, waiting for his next sentence. Then,

Garek: [My wife, Reala… has no memories from before out meeting, fifteen years ago.]

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Garek had met Reala before becoming an influential person in the city of Pristella, back when he was merely a merchant rooted in Pristella.

On that day, on his way back from negotiations that had taken place far from the city, Garek, who had been driving a dragon carriage, had found his path blocked by a landslide. The business deal had broken down, and Garek could not stand the frustration of having to face even more misfortune while on the road, as he struggled to repay a loan.

——Then, in that tragic landslide, he found a woman buried alive.

It had been a miracle. There was no other explanation.

Refusing to make a detour, Garek had desperately wondered if he could still follow his original route. Around that time, the heavy rain finally stopped, and Garek’s full field of vision returned.

Garek had come across the landslide not long after it happened, meaning that the woman had been buried for a fairly short time.

As a result of the various miracles overlapping, Garek had found and rescued the woman, who was still breathing.

She had been covered in mud, and he had found no luggage near her. Taking the unconscious woman to his dragon carriage, Garek immediately rushed to a nearby town, where she was taken to a clinic, and awaited her rehabilitation.

Garek: [At the time, her condition was incredibly precarious. She had a high fever, and had various injuries and bone fractures from the landslide. Her heart even stopped at one point during treatment.]

As the unlikely situation carried on, both the people at the clinic and Garek struggled to help her, hoping for her recovery. Why had Garek wanted so desperately to save her? There had indeed been a reason which explained his actions, yet it was unknown to him.

He was grateful to everyone’s efforts, from the bottom of his heart.

Garek: [Hard work paid off and she survived. Although she was still heavily wounded, I remember being really relieved when it became clear her life was no longer threatened. She woke up shortly after. It took a week… I stayed in the city, waiting for her to wake up.]

The failure of negotiations had made the future of Garek’s company grim.

In that situation, wasting time equated wasting money. Garek did not understand why he had been restraining himself from his travels. But something unknown kept Garek rooted there.

Then, after a week, the woman woke up.

After her awakening, the people rejoiced. She spoke to the crowd gathered around her with a trembling, faint voice.

Garek: [“Who am I?”, were her first words.]

The woman had forgotten her name. No, not just her name. She had forgotten everything.

Who was she, where did she come from, and what was she trying to do? What had happened before that cliff had collapsed?

Everyone was at a loss regarding her treatment, as she could not remember her family members. All she had were the clothes she was wearing during the accident. Sewn on the fabric were the only discernible letters of her name, or perhaps even an acronym. “Re”.

Garek: [Influenced by the name of a blossoming flower, I decided to call her Reala. Then, I planned to take care of her until her wounds had fully healed.]

Her wounds healed little by little, and, soon enough, she was discharged from the clinic.

Reala, even having nowhere to go, remained a cheerful woman. She treated that terrible accident as if it had never happened, and she had the power to make all those she interacted with smile.

In her situation, it would be impossible not to feel uneasy. The loss of one’s own memories was equivalent to losing one’s own existence. But she still carried on smiling, because she felt it necessary to do so.

Or maybe she was concerned for the people around her.

But the most important reason was that she did not see herself as unfortunate.

Garek: [The nervousness from confessing to her, asking her to come with me, is still fresh in my memory. The time between my question and her reply is probably the most anxious I’ve ever been in my life. Even more so than when I proposed marriage to her.]

So, accepting Garek’s proposal, Reala went with him to Pristella.

The reason why he had refused to abandon her, the reason why he had waited so long for her to wake up, was incredibly simple.

At that moment, when he dragged her from that landslide, carried her to his dragon carriage, and cleaned the mud off her face, Garek fell in love with her instantly.

Garek: [My business, which had been unlucky until I took in Reala, improved quickly. The people around me said that it was all thanks to my talent. Ridiculous, it was all thanks to Reala. She brought me good luck, she blessed me, so now I can be a merchant like this, a city manager, and a father.]

Garfiel: [————]

Garek: [I love my wife, and our children are both very cute. I used to care about her past, but, at this moment, no matter who she was before, I consider my wife my most important person.]

Garek finished speaking about everything, from their first encounter to the present, and concluded thus with embarrassment.

Garfiel, who had been silent from beginning to end, listening intently, looked up at the sky.

In the darkness, stars were scattered everywhere. The glorious full moon and the glitter of the stars were probably looking down on his current thoughts.

Garek: [I am very sorry to ask this of you, but I cannot help but do so.]

Garfiel: [————]

Garek: [What is the relationship between you… and my wife, Reala?]

This—— how cruel was this question.

His line of sight fell from the sky to Garek in front of him.

Garek’s gentle eyes held firm determination as he gazed at Garfiel. He would not be so insensitive as to misunderstand what Garfiel would say, or what emotions he held.

And so Garfiel knew exactly which answer would be correct.

Garfiel: [————]

Opening and closing his mouth.

Breathing, exhaling, inhaling, breathing repeatedly.

Heartbeat, fast. Eyes, dazed. A burst of pain in his head, the need to retch.

The swirl of mixed emotions tightened his chest, already on the verge of collapse.

——Mimi gripped his hand tightly.

Garfiel: [My amazin’ self, has…]

Garek: [————]

Garfiel: [Nothin’… to do with yer wife.]

There. He had said it, said it out loud.

With that sentence, the vortex swirling in Garfiel’s heart swiftly vanished.

He was left with only a suffocating sense of loss. Garek, who stood in front of him, lowered his head as if he had made a mistake, not wanting to look Garfiel in the face, speaking with a trembling voice.

Garek: [I feel so sorry…]

With a look of unnatural pain, he bowed. However, Garfiel did not want to see Garek’s reaction.

Enough. He had enough already, stop. He wanted to leave, wanted to stop being hurt.

What had gone wrong? Whose fault was it? Was it his own fault, or was it Garek’s fault? Who should he blame? Who should he crush, who should he eat, who should he send flying?

What could he do, to end the pain in his heart, to make it vanish, disappear to parts unknown?

???: [Honey…! This is great, Gorgeous-san and Mimi are still here.]

Garfiel: [——!?]

Those words echoed with immense volume. Grief and turmoil raised the noise, making it so intense it could kill.

To Garfiel, on this day, its appearance was immensely scarier than a knife.

Garek: [Reala, why…]

Reala: [You left in such a hurry, but I didn’t want you to go home empty-handed, so…]

While Garek was surprised by his wife’s appearance, Reala winked, walking by him.

Then, she approached the stunned, stiff Garfiel, stretching out her hand.

Reala: [These are some sweets sowarie[3] that I made. Although it’s not much of a sign of gratitude, I’m still proud of it. So I hope you’ll accept it.]

Garfiel: […Ah.]

Her smile held not a trace of malice. Stubbornly, Garfiel refused to speak. His exchange with Garek had opened old wounds, preventing him from being able to speak to Reala.

Anyone able to read the mood would understand the meaning of his silence. And yet,

Mimi: [Oh! A dessert, that’s so much fun! Amazing, I’ll share it with the lady!]

Obviously, Mimi smiled at the bag of sweets presented by Reala, completely neglecting to notice the atmosphere. Garek looked shocked, and Garfiel was speechless. But. Only Reala laughed in joy at Mimi’s reaction.

Reala: [I’m so glad you like it, and please go share it with the one you call lady.]

Mimi: [Okay, onderstood! Unter… understood~!]

After saluting with the hand that was not being held by Garfiel, a hand still displaying a blueish hue, Mimi put that container in her pocket and clapped Garfiel on the back.

She had applied enough power that he couldn’t help but enter a coughing fit, and Mimi smiled.

Mimi: [Well, this time, we’re really leaving! Gorgeous Tiger and Gorgeous Mimi will see you later~!]

Reala: [Alright, safe travels. Take care not to fall in the water, Gorgeous-san.]

Mimi took Garfiel’s hand, and Reala waved as they left.

Smiling, Mimi turned back and waved, only for Reala to wave even more vigorously. Only the two men had been left with pained expressions after this smiling farewell.

Garfiel: […]

Like this, Garfiel was led along the path to the side of the waterway by Mimi, his arm being pulled. Mimi did not speak to Garfiel, walking until Reala had long vanished from view.

Garfiel: [Hey, midget…]

Mimi: [Over here~!]

Garfiel: [——!?]

Garfiel wanted to stop Mimi, but was suddenly interrupted.

Mimi, still holding Garfiel’s hand, rapidly leapt onto a three-story building stone, ascending with the use of footholds. Garfiel was pulled along, of course, forced to take the same pace as her. With a few leaps, the two reached the top of the building.

Mimi: [Hmm! Feels so good~!]

Garfiel: [So good, my ass! What were ya pullin’, just now…]

As Mimi bathed in the breeze, Garfiel turned around to confirm her intention.

However, he saw that Mimi was staring at him, her face devoid of a smile. He saw himself reflected in her round eyes, and Garfiel did not understand the unease brewing in his heart.

Faced with Garfiel’s silence, Mimi’s expression suddenly broke.

Mimi: [Garf, do you want to cry?]

Garfiel: [Huh? What’re ya sayin’, why would my amazin’ self cry?]

Mimi: [I know that Garf is strong, but you shouldn’t put on that strong act. Reala, she’s Garf’s mother, right~?]

Garfiel: [————]

At Mimi’s unexpected question, Garfiel held his breath.

She had accurately grasped the flow of the things. If she did indeed know of Garfiel’s circumstances, then that conclusion would be easy to make. However, Mimi knew nothing about Garfiel’s family. Her ability to discern the truth was really rather impressive.

The fact she had brought up that horrifying topic in such a straight-forward manner shook Garfiel, and he hesitated.

Garfiel: [Why… would ya… think that…?]

Mimi: [Garf and Reala smell supeeeer similar, and both of Reala’s children also smelled a bit like Garf. That’s why~.]

Her assumption was not based on logical reasoning, but on something innate, and thus she could see the truth clearly. If Mimi had inferred her conclusion from Garfiel’s words, he could have made attempts to hide his past. But, like this, Garfiel was unable to deny it.

His legs giving out, Garfiel looked up at the sky, in a daze.

Both the stars and moon were unchanged, and just as before, they were looking down at Garfiel.

Mimi: [So, is that right? Is Reala Garf’s mother?]

Garfiel: […My amazin’ self doesn’t know. Is that woman still my amazin’ self’s mother?]

At Mimi’s words, Garfiel covered his face with his hand.

He did not know. That truly, unmistakably was the feeling swirling in Garfiel’s heart, right now.

Reala was unmistakably Reshia. Just as Garek had said, and as her actions up until this point had demonstrated, Reala had completely forgotten that she was Reshia.

Forgetting everything, Reshia had found a new start as Reala, raising her children, living happily.

Garfiel: [Ah, come to think of it, that’d make those two kids my amazin’ self’s lil’ brother ‘n sister…]

Although he had only realized it just now, those siblings, their father a different person from his own, were related to him the same way he was related to Frederica. In other words, those siblings were his own lovely younger siblings. It had been a relationship he had longed for ever since his childhood, being the youngest between himself and Frederica.

——Wouldn’t it be nice if he could enjoy that relationship without the circumstances that surrounded it?

Garfiel: [Even if my amazin’ self tells her ‘bout my heritage, nothin’d change…]

Reala had forgotten her time as Reshia.

Even if Garfiel spilled out everything he knew, the fifteen years she had spent as Reala would still remain unchanged, and the fifteen-or-so years she had spent as Reshia would remain lost.

Only, Reala would then be saddled with the burden of fifteen years of guilt, feeling like she had lost her life as Reshia. That was unnecessary. Garek would only be able to witness his wife’s depression, and their children would only watch their mother’s suffering, while being completely unaware of its cause.

Doing so would only be for Garfiel’s own sake.

Garfiel would be the only one gaining from having Reala accept that she used to be Reshia. Neither Frederica nor Ryuzu knew of Reshia’s survival. If Garfiel said nothing, the two of them would never know.

The members of Reala’s family would not know of her past without Garfiel’s testimony. If they learned of it, those happy times would most likely be lost rather than preserved.

All it would take for all of this to be successfully resolved, was to have Garfiel hide everything, hide all of his feelings accumulating in his chest, and let go.

Garfiel: [Why is my amazin’ self…]

Could he not even find the courage to throw it away, to forget it, to bury it deep within himself?

Tiger… Tiger, where did you go? Show me the right path.

Only he could bear everything, take on everything alone, and still have the strength to stand up.

Tell me, tiger… tiger. A true tiger was the strongest existence, second to none.

Garfiel: [————]

Holding his head, biting down on his molars, lamenting the feelings swirling back and forth mixing together, it was then Garfiel noticed.

Mimi: [It’s okay…]

In the next moment, he noticed that his head was being gently stroked, hugged by a small bosom.

Garfiel: [————]

Still collapsed on the ground, Garfiel was grabbed by Mimi from behind in a hug.

Resting her chin on his head, her small palm gently stroked Garfiel’s head. That tender touch on his back, moving back and forth, gradually eased the pain and agitation of his head.

Garfiel: [What, what’re ya doin’, this is…]

Mimi: [Hmm, if Garf needs to cryyy, I think there’s a specific place where boys are allowed to cry! Although I forgot where, I remember the lady telling me about it~!]

For a moment, she seemed to be giving an answer, but her train of thought drifted away.

In order to keep his heart from shaking, in order to keep his voice from trembling, Garfiel chose his words carefully.

Like this, holding Garfiel, Mimi giggled.

Mimi: [Well, although I’ve forgotten, is it the feeling of a woman’s chest? Is it like that? That’s it! It’s alright for a man to cry on the chest of a woman he’s interested in!]

Garfiel: […Who’d be interested in a midget like ya.]

The one Garfiel was interested in was a woman who was never kind when he wanted her to be, but when he least expected, after which she would beat him with her fists. She was a woman who was incredibly difficult to deal with.

The girl in front of him did not resemble her at all. However, Mimi was still smiling despite Garfiel’s answer.

Mimi: [That’s fine! Even if Garfiel’s not in love with Mimi, Mimi already is! Hey, a girl who likes Garf! So! Mimi’s chest~! It’s okay to cry there~!]

Garfiel: [——Ah.]

What a foolish notion. What was this? Some kind of language game? It was only a child’s excuse, loaded with nothing but assertiveness.

There was obviously nothing, so stop kidding around.

Tiger… Tiger, where did you go?

Right now, come back to my heart. Howl your deep, ferocious roar, beat this slouched back, force me to wake up, do something to my feelings.

Otherwise, otherwise… Otherwise, it will be too late.

Garfiel: [Mother…]

Enough, enough, enough! Stop talking. Don’t make such a weak voice. Don’t cry with such a weak voice.

He was a tiger, a tiger. The most powerful, the strongest, studier than anyone. The Strongest of Shields. However,

Garfiel: [Mother… mama… mama…!!]

Mimi: [Good boy.]

Garfiel: [Why! Why did ya forget me!? I’ve met ya after all this time! Can’t my amazin’ self… even call ya mom!?]

Mimi: [It’s alright, Garfiel’s a good boy, a good boy.]

Garfiel: [Mama… mama… mama…!]

Tiger… Tiger, where did you go?

What do I look like now? Stars, moon, sky, tell me.

What do I look like now?

If I can’t be a roaring tiger, then what do I look like right now——!?

Translation Notes:

[1] – If you haven’t noticed by now, Reala calls her daughter “big sister” (お姉ちゃん).

[2] – Reala seems to be using a corrupted form of the word “soirée” when converted to Katakana, “ソワリエ”, instead of “ソワレ”. “Soirée” is a loanword from French, that could mean something like “evening party” or “evening performance”. Obviously, neither really make any sense in context. Much thanks to LoremIpsumVerb for the assistance with this mysterious Katakana.

[3] – Once again, the corrupted form of “soirée” is being used here, and again without making a whole lot of sense. Considering the meaning of this word, Reala seems to be giving out some kind of sweet pastry meant to be consumed after dinner, but this is just my interpretation. Once again, thanks to LoremIpsumVerb for the assistance with this mysterious Katakana.

 

101 thoughts on “Arc 5, Chapter 30 – “Tiger and Cat Under the Moon””

  1. This was truly beautiful, tears welled up in my eyes at just how amazing this was written. Character development like this is surely excellent

    1. I guess, but for me though – Gate of Steiner is kind of like Call of the Witch(Except used more sparingly). Not really meant for emotional moments like these, unless you’re talking about the version from Steins;Gate Zero.

      1. If Gate of Steiner was part of Re Zero’s OST, then it’d probably play during really important moments – like when Rem got put into a coma(Just as an example)

  2. Sobs Garf is such a good boy… just how many others could be so selfless like Garf under the same situation, being so considerate of his mother’s and her family’s happiness, at the cost of his own? We dont deserve such a good boi cries

  3. Its good that Garf’s mum survived that accident but losing her memories of Garf and Fredrica is just so sad

  4. Yeah this one here’s a real tearjerker. Gotta give props to the author here, this was so well written, and unpredictable. Ya could just feel the emotions towards the end there “Why’d ya forget me”

  5. Arc 4 has already made me cry countless times, how many more times will I have to cry with Re: zero, there are so many unexpected things.

    1. I think I cried at least 5 different times during Arc 4. I’m really… really… hoping I can find happiness in Arc 5 and 6. But then there’s this. Garfiel is already my favorite side-character in Re:Zero ever since he started calling Subaru captain, and now he has to be figuratively kicked in the nuts by finding his thought to be dead mom? Pain. All I feel is pain.

    1. F*ck gluttony and F*ck his happiness.
      I don’t know if this would make it better or worse, but I know one thing for sure

      IM SAD AND ANGRY

      I hope gluttony never dies but instead suffers eternal demnation in a hell where he can never suffice his hunger… than again. I think gluttony and greed are not like betelgeuse and sirius, who were forced into insanity. I feel like gluttony and greed are real bishofs of their own accord and deserve hell.

      I don’t want someone as innocent as mother to suffer by gluttony.
      Didn’t she suffer enough 🙁

      1. lo dudo, al menos que gula se halla echado un paseo por ahi, por cierto, una cosa es que se hallan vuelto locos y otra cosa es que el ambiente en el que vivan regulus y ley y roy los haya convertido en eso, regulus no se, y ley y roy tampoco
        me parece una exageración todo lo que dices, eso del infierno te lo puedo asegurar, pero ya es una exageración de lo de ley y eso, no crees

  6. For the first time in this entire series, I cried. I can’t even imagine the pain that Garf is going through. He’s had to grow up so much so fast and in a matter of hours his pride and his very soul just get rocked to the core. Mimi is so perfect and precious. I might have to stop reading for today.

  7. I’m starting to see a pattern here:

    The bois be like: “I love women who doesn’t love me yet”

    Also the bois: “Women who loves me tenderly doesn’t get my love”

    Rem and Mimi supporters where you at?

    1. Mimi: I love you
      Garfiel: I love Ram
      Ram:I love Roswaal-sama
      Roswaal:I love teacher
      Echidna:…
      .
      Subaru: I love Emilia
      Sirius: No love me Betelgeuse
      Betelgeuse: I love Satella
      Satella:I love Subaru

      1. Mimi: I love Garfiel
        Garfiel: I love Ram
        Ram: I love Roswaal-sama
        Roswaal: I love Sensei
        Echidna: I love RBD
        Subaru: I love Emilia
        Emilia: I don’t know what love is……

        Rem: I love Subaru-kun
        Petra: I love Subaru
        Satella: I love you
        S****a: I love Master
        Subaru: I love EMT!

        Sirius: I love Petelgeuse
        Petelgeues: I love Satella
        Satella: I love Subaru

        Wilhelm: I love Theresia
        Theresia: I love Wilhelm

        Yay! There’s one that’s normal!!

  8. It sounds like she lived a sad life before her accident ,sad as it is for our poor boy Garfiel maybe its best she doesnt remember

  9. It’s so good. It really gave my heart a rollercoaster of so many feelings.

    Mother… Mother… Mama… Mama…

    It really is sad . I anyone will cry.

  10. This was a really sad chapter but I don’t understand how people would cry while reading this no pictures I mean if it was animated sure but it might just be me lol tho

    1. this chapter is well written, and sad. people like me who have trouble crying obviously couldnt cry but even i had some tears well up.

    2. really depends on the type of person, first time i read this i only got my eyes a little moist thats all…
      second reason is something i like to call semi schizophrenia, if you have been reading stuff like this for a few months/years you can develop the ability to become “immersed”. sometimes you imagzs are automatically inserted in your head sometimes that isnt needed at all in the first place. prolonged immersing can leave you feeling out of reality and if youre sleepy you better pray your incorrected logic fallacies dont leak out from your head. sometimes people have sound effects/music automatically play in their heads while others play the music themselves from youtube to add immersion. dont have any data about what happens when you’re intoxicated (since probably all of the people i asked about this are minors), but youre free to get a real psychology degree and see for yourself

  11. Damn it the tears are flowing— who the fck is cutting onions here? Stop it i don’t wanna too much in arc 5 like i did in the other arcs (looking at you, arc 2,3, and especially 4)

  12. Even with someone who is strong like Garfiel, everybody cries no matter how much fortitude he has, the shet he has been through is proof enough.

    Beautiful chapter

  13. Damn this hit me right in the feels
    Re:Zero makes me more emotional than any other anime/series could before

  14. F*cking Re:Zero, always making me sweat by the eyes

    Good chapter, glad to see that she found happiness, but man… poor Garfiel.

    i hope he develops feelings for Mimi, as Ram doesnt seem like losing her crush towards Roswall so soon. Glad to see Mimi being developed too, instead of just being a comedic relief

    1. I pray he doesn’t develop anything for Mimi. Because the alternative is that Ram really does stay with Roswaal and that is just unbelievably disgusting on so many different levels.

  15. I read this chapter while listened to “Death Ballet” thinking she would be Lust. What a foolish decision.

  16. Damn ninjas cutting onions again…
    My tears just welled up and it didn’t stop…. this is truly…. sad
    i thought i was inpenatrable to crying at anime but this is the closest ive ever gotten i didnt cry but it almost happened

  17. Insane that people like this chapter, completely fucking insane.

    Ignoring that Garfiel’s reaction to the events of the chapter are well written and sweet, the existence of this chapter is complete dogshit. The most unnecessary retcon of Garfiel’s backstory, that serves only to be a catalyst for a hamfisted Mimi scene, WHICH ONLY EXISTS AS A HAMFISTED REASON IN THE NEXT COUPLE OF CHAPTERS FOR GARFIEL TO BE OVERLY AFFECTED BY HER DEATH, WHICH ONLY EXISTS AS A HAMFISTED WAY OF FORCING ANY KIND OF NEW DRIVE FOR GARFIEL BECAUSE THE AUTHOR HAS REALISED HE ALREADY GAVE GARF HIS EMOTIONAL CLIMAX IN THE LAST ARC, AND IF HE’S GONNA KEEP HIM AROUND IN THE STORY LONGER THAN HE ORIGINALLY ANTICIPATED HE NOW NEEDS TO PULL SOMETHING OUT OF HIS ASS TO GIVE GARFIEL A REASON TO EXIST AT ALL.

    Mimi is not a character. Mimi is a tool used to create a motivation for Garfiel. She is not her own entity, she’s a plot device. And the author still couldn’t come up with a sensical way to make you care about Mimi, so he does it by…..changing something that didn’t need to change, that CHEAPENS CATHARSIS ALREADY ACHIEVED, PURELY TO GIVE HIS DEATH-MACGUFFIN A REASON TO HUG GARFIEL.

    Dogshit fucking trash

    1. I saw a few of your other comment on previous chapter and I can’t understand why you keep on hating almost every choice the author makes if you truly hate the story and the author that much just stop reading.

    2. Don’t read this webnovel if you just want to criticize the author he is giving us sad story to tear us up if you don’t like sad anime then don’t read this webnovel

    3. You’re a little dumb in the head, aren’t ya? Don’t worry, it’s not your fault if you can’t understand these types of stories, but don’t get mad of your own lack of understanding and stick to more age-appropriate media, like dora the explorer

  18. This chapter was so well written showing the depth of character’s especially Garfield is shown in this chapter as a character that is bold, energetic, idiotic and brave but also emotional a nice chapter showing Garfield character

  19. Garfield X Mimi
    As ram is in love with roswall and thinks of Garfield as his little brother.

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